Page 77 of Brother In Arms

“I’m Dani, Red-Thirteen’s ol’ lady.”

“Oh, hi…” I didn’t want to be rude but I didn’t want to just let her in to Rush’s room, either.

She smiled and helped me out by saying, “I don’t want to come in; I just thought you might be interested in some of my party favors.” She held out her hand with a tiny little pill on it and I recognized it immediately. It was hard to grow up rich and not know what Xanax was.

“I really want that,” I said and hung my head.

“Hey, no shame in that. I know how it goes, believe me.” I held out my hand and she dumped the tiny pill into it and brought her other hand into view, a glass of water in it.

“Try and get some sleep, I was supposed to get your sizes so we could get some clothes for you, but if you want to wait, that’s cool too.”

“Oh, um… I wear a size eight jeans and a large shirt.”

“Great, we’ll see about rounding something up for you so we can take you shopping.”

I groaned, “Oh, god, my purse, my wallet, everything went up with the house!”

“It’s okay, we’ll figure it out. Just take that and try not to worry about it for now.”

I took the damn pill and downed the water handing it back. “Thanks Dani,” I murmured and she smiled.

“No problem, we’ll see you later.”

I closed the door, mind racing while I waited for the little pill to kick in and even me out. I didn’t even know what had happened to my cellphone. The last time I remember having it, I was panicking and talking too quickly to the emergency operator, telling her we were trapped in my burning house.

I pressed the heels of my hands into my eye sockets and took a bunch of deep breaths trying to keep from bursting into another fit of useless crying. I was anxiety riddled, pacing Rush’s room like a caged thing and for a half second I almost panicked, wondering what would happen if I got stuck like this and the pill didn’t work.

I tried to make myself useful, but Rush was so damn neat I didn’t have anything to do. I picked up my towels and hung them on the hooks set into the back of the door, having no place else to put them that wouldn’t ruin furniture or cause the carpet to go musty.

After that, I turned to Rush’s beautiful but too-large bed. I pulled back the blankets and got in, pulling the pillow Rush used most against my chest, hugging it tightly, breathing in his smell. I don’t remember anything after that. Like nothing. Maybe the pill hadn’t been Xanax after all, maybe it had been something more potent. In any case, whatever it was? I think I liked it.

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