Page 62 of The Lineman

Sisi: Ew. Just Ew.

Me: Um, hello, this is about me, people, not Matty and his, um, flagpole.

Sisi: Yes, yes, Mr. Attention Hog needs the spotlight.

Matty: I think we need a Jockstrap night.

Omar: Yes! I’m not terribly sports minded, but YES!

Sisi: Did I miss the rainbow-colored memo? What’s a jockstrap?

Me: It’s a piece of clothing that . . .

Sisi: Fuck off, power boy.

Matty: It’s a gay sports bar where men who like men gather. Most have no fashion sense—or good sense, for that matter.

Me: Hello, I like sports—and jockstraps—and bars named after jockstraps.

Matty: They have trivia night.

Trivia night. Oh, God. I was fairly sure Mike had mentioned loving pub trivia.

Me: Um, Mike likes trivia.

Sisi: Picture this—me jumping up and down clapping. YES. It’s time he met the fam.

Matty: A spanking!

Omar: An initiation!

Me: NO! No spanking or initiation. Just a nice, quiet evening with beer and unanswerable questions.

Sisi: Bring your tribute. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Matty: Muahahaha!

Omar: This is rich.

Me: I hate all of you. Eight o’clock. Be there. Matty, it’s a sports bar. No chiffon.

Matty: What if it’s team-colored chiffon?

Me: No. Just no.

Matty: Party pooper. ER is calling. Toodles.

Omar: That still kills me. Who says toodles?

Sisi: Your very queer better half. All day, every day. Oh, shit. Gotta go. Bad car accident.

Omar: See you tonight, Reacher.

Reacher? Again? What the hell?

Chapter twenty

Mike

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