Page 87 of A Hard Sell

“Yes?”

“I…um… I like you.” It hung between them for a moment, finally free. “That is… I care about you, a lot.” Well, it wasn’t ‘I love you’, but it would have to do for now.

Luka watched Thomas’ face change, from uncertainty to joy, then back again.

He looked down at his hands where he clutched his coffee, then up at Luka. “I care about you, too. A lot.”

Luka’s heart leaped into his throat.

“But…” Thomas continued, then it crashed into his shoes. “I’m leaving soon.”

“Yeah.” Luka nodded and looked back to the river. “I know.”

“It will be easier when I leave…if we don’t…”

Luka found it hard to swallow through the lump in his throat. “Right.” He already knew that, of course. That didn’t stop it from feeling like a sword through his chest. “And…you’re leaving for sure?”

Thomas nodded, his face tight. “That’s what I do. That’s…my life.”

Silence fell again, this one tortured.

Thomas took his hand. “I’m sorry.”

Luka held Thomas’ hand for a moment, studying the strong fingers laced through his. A petal drifted down onto his nose. He flicked it away. “Me too.” He squeezed Thomas’ hand, then let go and stood, brushing the blossoms off his clothes. “Shall we walk?”

They strolled along the river for a while, Luka chattering away about anything and everything trivial that came to mind. He asked Thomas questions about his bike, and told him about how he and Tawney had found this place by accident the first time because the GPS had refused to let them U-turn. He commented on the adorableness of passing dogs and babies, and contemplated what other sorts of things the restaurant should stuff into their pastry. When he ran out of things to talk about, he took some pictures of the trees to send to Tawney. He even managed to convince Thomas to let him take his picture.

“I don’t do selfies,” Thomas mumbled.

“Well, it’s not a selfie if I take it. Come on, just a little smile. You don’t even have to look at me, just…stare pensively at the river.”

Thomas quirked an eyebrow at Luka, then turned to look at the rushing water. His mouth was soft, not really smiling, but not really not. He even let Luka take one of the two of them together under the blossoms, petals in their hair again.

When the sun was hanging low in the sky, casting long shadows down the path ahead, it was time for them to go home. Luka took one last look at the trees, knowing that he would never be here with Thomas again. He brushed a few petals off his sleeve and slipped them into his pocket.

Luka rested his cheek on Thomas’ shoulder on the way home, closed his eyes and breathed him in. Remembered.

Chapter Twenty

The Heart Wants What It Wants

When he got home, Luka pressed the cherry blossoms in the pages of his battered copy ofPride and Prejudice. “Am I a sentimental idiot?” he asked himself, smoothing a hand over the cover. “Yes, yes I am.” He left the book on his bedside table.

It was an agonizing weekend, torn between the euphoria of Thomas liking him back, and the torture of knowing nothing was going to happen. He was nervous at his desk Monday morning waiting for Thomas to arrive. What should he say? What should henotsay? Luka had hugged Thomas again when they had gotten off the motorcycle, wanting to stay wrapped in those strong arms for an eternity or two. But then they had parted ways with little more than a quiet “See you Monday.”

Thomas came in holding a tray from Jitters. “Good morning. I got you an iced coffee and a muffin.” He held it out with an uncertain smile.

Luka melted. “Thank you. That was so sweet.” He took the tray as tears pricked behind his eyes. Oh, God, it was hurting. Was this what it was going to be like now? “What did the chalkboard say?” he asked to distract himself as he pulled his cup out.

“It was, um… ‘Today’s special, and so are you’.”

“Ha.” A nervous laugh was the only response he could muster. Butterflies danced in his stomach as he nibbled at the muffin. They made a plan for their day, and spent some time debating which voice actor they wanted.

“I still like Samuel,” Thomas said. “His voice just has this quality to me…”

“You think he sounds hot, don’t you?” Luka said, trying to keep things light.

Thomas turned bright red. “No, it’s not that…”

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