Page 75 of A Hard Sell

Luka wiped more tears away, trying to catch his breath as the train rattled on. “What did your dad think about it?”

“He supported me, of course.” Thomas smiled. “He even let us rehearse in our garage. He was a subversive bastard, never quite liked to fit in. I think he’d be horrified by my closet full of suits now.”

“Are you kidding? He’d be so fucking proud of you.” Luka didn’t even have to think twice about it.

Thomas’ eyes met his from only inches away. “Thank you.”

The train jostled, and Luka swayed into Thomas’ chest. For a second it felt like he was going in for a kiss. He cleared his throat and looked away as he righted himself.

“I’m sure your parents are so proud of you, too. Did you tell them you were performing tonight?” Thomas asked.

“Not yet. We’ll see how it goes.” His mom would have herded Oscar into the car for the five-hour drive if he’d told her.

They continued to chat as they made their way up the stairs and back onto the sidewalk. Luka didn’t even notice they had arrived at Jitters until Thomas stopped walking.

“Here we are. I’d offer to come in again…”

Luka shook his head. “Thank you, but…no.” His stomach heaved. The pool of anxiety that had drained away when Thomas had been talking came flooding back.

Thomas put a hand on Luka’s shoulder and squeezed. “You’re going to do so great.”

Luka nodded. “Thanks.”

Thomas looked at him again, then he put his hands in his pockets and turned to stride across the street.

Luka took one last huge gulp of cool air before pushing open the door, the weight of his guitar heavy on his back. The place was jammed, the typical background hum of a coffee house now a dull roar. His nerves fizzed as he made his way over to the counter. The chalkboard read,You can’t buy happiness but you can buy coffee and that’s almost the same thing.

True enough.

“Where do I check in?” he leaned over to ask above the noise.

The barista pointed to a man hovering at a table with a clipboard on the other side of the room.

As Luka made his way over, a sharp crack of laughter burst out from a group he was passing by. He flinched.

He took another step, his mouth drying up. The table was packed full of beautiful men and women, looking way too glamorous for a coffee house open mic night. One of the men met his eyes, and he could swear a sneer curled around his lips. A woman’s gaze swept up and down his body. A bored look crossed her face as she turned back to her giggling friends.

This was junior high all over again. What was he doing here? He hesitated in the middle of the shop. The sign-in table was still so far away. Clipboard guy hadn’t noticed him yet.I can’t do this.

He turned and bolted for the door. He pushed his way back outside, ducking against the cold wind as it stung his cheeks. Back to the subway station, home to wallow in failure.So stupid.

But then he heard a voice call to him from across the street. “Luka?”

He stopped and looked up. Thomas was standing in front of his building.

Guess the wallowing was starting now. He was so embarrassed that Thomas had seen him running with his tail between his legs. He stood frozen to the spot as Thomas hurried back across the street.

“What happened? Are you okay?” Thomas asked as he got closer. His brow was pinched in concern.

“Yeah. No. I, uh… Fuck. I bailed. I’m sorry.” Another blast of cold wind hit them, more winter than spring. He hunched his shoulders against the icy fingers down his neck.

Thomas was silent for a moment. “Oh.”

Luka stared at his feet. “I don’t think I can do it.”

“What happened?”

Luka knew he meant just now, inside the café. But it was a much longer answer. He sighed. “How much time do you have?”