Page 83 of Work with Me

Cooper.Thinking about his judgmental face made ice flow through my veins.

“What? Why’d you say ‘Cooper’?” Jackson murmured into my neck.

“Oops.” I stepped around him, out of the bedroom. He followed, his bare feet silenced by the carpet.

“Hey,” he said when we reached the living room. “Maybe you, me, and Noah could do something together. We could go to a basketball game. Or hiking. Even one of those obnoxious places with animatronics and cardboard pizza.”

It’d be bad enough for me when Jackson left. I couldn’t face another one of Noah’s yearning expressions like the one he had whenever we saw Rick. “I—I don’t want to confuse Noah. So I’d rather not involve him.”

Jackson’s face fell. Then he gave me a half-smile that didn’t brighten his eyes. “Whatever you want, sweetheart.”

I wanted to take it back and see him smile again. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t let him hurt Noah. I took his hand and squeezed it. At last, the other corner of his mouth kicked up.

“Text me tomorrow?” I said.

“I’ll text you tonight.”

Tipping up on my toes, I kissed him, a long, languorous, we-have-all-the-time-in-the-world kiss. For now, we’d both pretend he’d stay long enough to give us a chance. Maybe if we pretended hard enough, it’d come true.

“I’ll text you back. Night, Jackson.”

I stepped out into the cool November night, my cheeks glowing with the thought of playing hooky with Jackson the day after tomorrow. It wouldn’t last forever, but he’d called himself my boyfriend, and the thought of kissing him again made my knees weak.

How long could he stay here in Austin? I didn’t know, and I didn’t think he knew, either. But for once in my life, I wasn’t going to worry about a year or even a month from now. I’d enjoy this new thing with Jackson Jones as long as I could.

Then I’d break.

29

JACKSON

After Alicia left,my stomach felt hollow. Digging through my drawer of restaurant delivery menus, I pulled out the one for the Thai restaurant I’d tried to tempt her with, but I laid it back in the drawer next to the plastic-wrapped forks, chopsticks, and ketchup packets. Even Thai food wouldn’t fill the emptiness inside me.

In the bedroom, I sniffed both pillows. One smelled faintly of sweet orange, so I brought it with me out into the living room. I stretched out on the sofa so my feet hung over the arm, tucked the pillow under my cheek, and picked up the remote. What was I in the mood for? Sports? Comedy? Something sexy and romantic?

I let the remote fall from my hand. Nothing could measure up to the replay of my afternoon with Alicia. I rubbed a hand over my Led Zeppelin T-shirt. One nipple still stung from her pinch. I wondered if I’d left a mark on her neck. If she’d be a little sore tonight. If she’d smell her skin for traces of me.

Wednesday. I’d see her Wednesday. Maybe we could go for a walk along the river. Or she could take me on a tour of the Capitol. I’d be the goofy tourist, buying the most ridiculous tchotchke I could find in the gift shop, and she’d be my sexy tour guide.

Or maybe we’d rent a hotel room overlooking the river for the afternoon and make love against the windows.

Make love? I meant fuck. Knock boots. Plow her field. Kneel at her altar. Go downtown.

Fuck. I squeezed the pillow. Who did I think I was bullshitting? Not myself.

This thing with Alicia was different. Sure, I’d been attracted to her since that first day, when I’d brushed her hair aside and blotted her wound with my T-shirt. And then I’d resented her. Well, not her, exactly, but everything her presence meant about me. Until the resentment had given way to respect. Admiration. And something softer that lit me up every time I looked at her.

Fuck. Was I in love?

I’d never been in love before. I’d never dated anyone I could connect with like that. It was safer to date women I didn’t care about. If I didn’t care, it wouldn’t hurt when they laughed at me and left me.

But after all we’d been through together, I didn’t think Alicia would do that to me. I’d seen that expression on her face in the shower, after I’d washed her hair. She’d looked at me like she cared, too. Like if I knocked at her gate long enough, she might eventually let me in. If I was persistent and trustworthy, she might even let me into her life. Except the part with Noah.

She didn’t trust me enough for that. Maybe it was fair, considering I still fucked things up. And there was no room for error with a kid. Poor guy had enough fucked-up things in his life, considering he had no parents and probably ADHD.

I hadn’t fucked up that conference, though. I’d helped Alicia through it. And maybe, once she pulled Noah out of that awful classroom and got him treatment, he’d do better in school.

Could she trust me then?

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