Page 140 of Unbound

"Fuck," Beck breathes. "That's grim." Then he scoops a huge mouthful of soup into his mouth and belches loudly.

"We stick together," Mireen says. "As long as we're together, we'll be okay, right?"

"Technically not true," Ambrose says. "If we're ambushed by fifty of Malakai's people, it won't really matter if we're together. We'll still be dead. Just… dead together."

I grin. "I think she was trying to make us feel better, Ambrose. Not speaking literally."

"Oh," Ambrose says. "Right. Together. We can all die together, like Mireen said."

I think about telling them more of what I've learned—about the siphons or even finally coming clean about what I am. More and more, I think I'll have to tell them before long or I'll burst. I know they'll all understand, too, which only makes it harder to keep the secrets.

Not yet, though. I think I’ll know when the time is right. When it feels like it’s more dangerous to keep them in the dark than tell them the truth. And I have an intuition that time is coming faster than I realize.

"Raith and I went to the quarry yesterday," I say instead, immediately regretting the admission when three pairs of eyes snap to me. "Just... reconnaissance. For the Crucible."

"You left campus?" Mireen asks, eyes wide before she smiles and then whacks my arm. "You dog. Got tired of fucking in your bed?"

"We were trying to scout," I say defensively.

"Scouting," Beck adds with a knowing look. "What was your scouting report on the contents of his pants? Find any fire serpents?"

"You guys are unbelievable." I want to be annoyed with them, but find myself laughing a little. Before coming here, I would've thought it was impossible to make jokes and be light when your life was under threat at all times. Now, though? Now I see it's the exact opposite.

If we didn't find ways to occasionally pretend everything was normal, we'd all have lost our minds by now.

"Well," Ambrose says slowly. "If nothing else, I think we can say for absolute certain now that Raith isn't planning on killing Nessa any time soon. One could've argued he was worried about being caught if he did it on school grounds. You went outside the walls with him. Alone. And you're still alive. Reckless, but alive."

Mireen nods. "I hate to say it, but I agree. I think we can trust him for now."

I look down at my stew, suddenly fascinated by a floating carrot. "He's... not what everyone thinks."

"You would know," Mireen tucks a loose coppery-colored hair that falls from her braid, blue eyes locked on me. "The two of you spend quite a bit of time 'training.'"

I shrug, aiming for nonchalance. "He's good with blades."

"Oh, yeah," Beck says with a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows. "He shows you how good he is at sheathing his sword a time or two, does he?"

My cheeks burn. "It's not like that. I've told you all millions of times."

"Your blush says otherwise," he teases.

"I do admire him," I admit, hoping a scrap of truth will throw them off the scent. "And he's obviously handsome. But he's not remotely interested in me, so it's pointless. Even if I did want there to be more between us, that's never going to happen."

"Right," Beck drawls, clearly unconvinced. "And I'm just friends with Brunhild."

"That's different," I protest. "You two are actually?—"

"Screwing like rabbits?" he supplies helpfully. "Yes, we are. And loving every minute of it."

"Too much information," Ambrose mutters, returning to his book. His eyes flick briefly to the next table where Serena's group sits, and I notice Beck's laughter quiets just a bit as his eyes follow Ambrose's.

Sometimes, the constant pulse of danger beating beneath everything seeps through and then I realize it's never really gone. It's like a faint ringing in the ears. You can ignore it for a time. Forget it entirely, even. But once you remember to listen, you realize it was there all along.

"Well,” Beck sighs and starts gathering his things. “Time for elemental history. Another fascinating lecture on how the Empire saved civilization from chaos and barbarism."

"Actually," Ambrose says, "I'm quite looking forward to it. Some of the things we're taught here are highly exclusive, you know. Things you would have to pay a great deal of money to learn on the outside. Things you'd probably have to know very particular groups of people to know. We should all feel privileged to?—"

Beck interrupts Ambrose by chucking a piece of bread at his face. Before it can hit, Arakon materializes in a blue flash and raises his wing, deflecting the bread. The water bird is gone again in an instant, leaving only a misty smear of blue sparks that fade to nothing.

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