Page 23 of Bound By Ruin

I like it when she doesn’t hide from me.

New guests toMidnightseem to think that my mask is a costume, a few of them smiling at me like they think I want to fuck them, or that they want to fuck me. But I’ve never been one to indulge in the flesh—and I’m not about to start tonight.

Flashbacks of that morning in Celia’s bed hover in the back of my mind, a ripple of heat pooling deep in my gut. It’s been happening more often lately, like the time spent hovering over Celia’s naked body has unlocked something within me. I don’t dare think—I don’t darehope—that it’s a piece of me that has been lying dormant all these years, waiting to be brought back to life.

A piece of me lost, now found.

I drag in a quick lungful of air and squeeze my aching eyes shut. All of this is too much. My body is still recovering, taking its time to heal, or maybe it never was healed to begin with, and now we’re merely feeling out what scraps are left to salvage. There can’t be much left worth keeping.

“Are you okay?” Than asks, hovering closer. He’s blocking off the rest of the room with his body, using every square inch of muscle and bone and armor to shield me from prying eyes. He may not realize that he’s doing it, but I’ve seen both of my brothers’ own protective tendencies enough times to recognize it here with Thanatos.

My brothers’ best defense is their offense, both of them striking out before any of us can get injured. But Thanatos, my half-brother, must take more after his mother than our father, because his defenseisa literal shield.

I’m starting to think that we might need that in our lives.

Tentatively, I reach out and touch his arm, allowing myself to feel his strength and to siphon some of it into my body. The doctors have always told me that the key to a long, healthy life is all about vitamin intake and exercise, but I’ve killed plenty of people to know that having a perfect body isn’t what gives you a long life.

It’s having a sound mind.

Mine is anything butsound.

I shake my head to drown out the static, sighing once my heartbeat drums in my ears. It’s a quick energetic exchange between the two of us, but it’s enough for me to refocus on our mission. As much as I’d rather spend the entire night watchingKrosotka, I’m supposed to be watching for our father instead.

We all are. Even as Rage summons Celia to sit in his lap on the throne, and even as she turns her nose up and walks the other way, bucking the plan, that’s what we’re supposed to be doing.

Keeping watch for the enemy, not for each other.

But I have a feeling that all five of us will struggle to reign in our desires when desire is the very thingMidnightthrives on, the very thread of it twisting through the air and ensnaring its victims like a siren’s song.

“This isn’t a good idea.” I track Celia’s path with my eyes, longing to follow her and knowing that it’s inevitable, becauseI will.And so will my brothers. We’re all doomed when it comes to our woman. “We’re all distracted.”

Thanatos swallows hard, his gaze mirroring mine. “Yeah.”

I pick at the edge of my face mask, itching to take it off. Ever since the last fire, it’s been harder and harder to keep it on. I feel like I’m suffocating within it—like it’s no longer a prop, but it’s fusing to my skin. “Rage will want to lock her in the cage if it means completing our mission.” I drag my hand down Than’s chest, feeling the thick bulge of his armor. It would be hard to pierce with a knife, maybe impossible, and bullets likely won’t get through either. “You should go by Riot,” I tell him, rapping my knuckles against an armored plate over his stomach.

He chuffs, taking a step back and avoiding my gaze. “What, so I can join the family legacy?”

“Yes.”

The scar cutting through his upper lip pulls as he twists his mouth. He takes a breath like he’s going to say something, then stops himself. “Yeah. Maybe.”

I grunt, pulling away from him. In the bratva, names are important. Blood is important, too, both in the ties it creates between family lines and the blood one spills on the floor. Names and blood are what keep us together, and since Thanatos can’t get any closer by blood, the only thing left is by name.

Riot can be ours.

Mine. My brothers’. Hers.

“You should let Thanatos die,” I conclude, taking another step away from him to follow Celia. “Shouldn’t you?”

I leave my half-brother to his thoughts, knowing that the decision should be as simple for him as it was for me, Rebel, and Rage.

Should be.

But I have a feeling that with Thanatos, there are a lot of things heshoulddo that he holds himself back from.

Chapter11

Celia

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