Page 67 of Prey for You

“They pay your bills. And we’re in a trial.”

“The Bureau would have to come to me with asearch warrantbefore I’d tell them what you speak to me about, Bridget,” he said stiffly. “I amnotan agent of the FBI. I am… I am here to help you. My reports to them are clinical notes—risk assessment—not therapeutic. They’re paying for my time.”

“Our whole agreement is that you havepermissionto tell them about what I’m doing, that’s the whole point—”

“No, Bridget. I have your permission to tell them if I assess you as being a danger to yourself or someone else. That’s it.”

I leaned forward and pinned him with my eyes. “If I had told you that I was in love with a guy who’d agreed to kill me, and I was going to elope with himafterhe was arrested for my attempted murder, I’m pretty sure you would have had some concerns for my safety. Yes?”

His lips pursed. “When you put it like that… yes. But…” he rubbed his face with one hand. “Bridget, how did you think this would work?”

“Exactly as it has—except for the part where they can force me to testify. That was a blow.”

Gerald shook his head.“Whywould you marry him?”

I took a deep breath and held his gaze, because he didn’t believe me when my eyes were shifty. And besides, it was the truth.

“Sam is the best person I know,” I said. I had to brace myself. It was harder to admit that than I wanted it to be. “And he’s like me. He has a dark side like I do. But he’s not scared of himself. I wish I wasn’t. I wish I could walk into the world as sure as he is about what’s right and what’s wrong. I wish I could be so ready to, like, help other people. Hesees me,Gerald. The real me. He doesn’t see a broken kid. Or a basket case. He gets it.”

Gerald’s brows pinched. “You think that’s how I see you?”

I wanted to punch him. “You kept harping at me to go see my father and see that, I quote,I’mnot a child!But it doesn’t matter whoIam—it matters whoheis and the hold he’ll have on me! But you won’t listen. You know who people don’t listen to? Kids.”

“That wasn’t what I meant—”

“And even if you don’t think I’m a child, youdefinitelythink I’m broken.”

His jaw tightened. “Aren’t you?”

“Bastard.”

“That’s not what I meant, Bridget. I meant, you think I’m not broken? You think I don’t have parts thatIneed help with? All of us are broken in some ways and not in others. That doesn’t make you a lesser person—”

“Apparently it makes me someone who should be railroaded into doing something I absolutelyrefuseto do!”

“But you’re making that decision out of fear. I want you to consider—”

“You want me to do what you think will help, regardless how it fucks up my head!”

“No, that’s not—”

“You’re not listening, Gerald,” I spat. “And that’s why I need Sam. Sam fuckinglistens.He even irritates me with reminding me of things I said before, or holding me to my word—that’s something you like, right? Accountability?”

“Yes!”

“Then try giving a shit about how I feel when you talk, instead of just getting your words out there and being right.”

He blew out a breath and looked away from me, his eyes trailing along the carpet off to his left, like he was searching for something.

“Okay. I hear you,” he said finally. “But can I also say that you don’t leave me a lot of choice, Bridget. Half the time I feel like if I don’t get the words out fast and… andhard,that you’ll brush them off and keep going. You’ve told me before you have no respect for people who are intimidated by you. Well, here we are. I’m not intimidated, but apparently that tells you I don’t care. So… how do I strike the balance? How do I speak strongly enough for you to listen, without you thinkingIcan’t? Because myonlygoal here is to stop you from getting yourself killed and help you heal so you can be happy.”

I gaped at him. “You think me talking to my dad makes melesslikely to get killed? More happy? You’re delusional!”

“Bridget, I met with him. A couple times. I’ve read his assessments. I watched video of his interactions in prison. I’m offering to go with you and be the buffer. I wouldneverput you in his path if I thought there wasanyrisk he was coming for you.”

“You don’t know my father.”

“No, Bridget:Youdon’t. You haven’t spoken to him. You haven’t heard him, or seen him interact with others since you were a child.That’swhat I meant. If you’re ever going to be free of this, your heart needs to understand that he is a mortal man. Not some…beingwith control over everyone in your sphere.”

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