Page 103 of Prey for You

“Bridget that is such bullshit.” But his voice was surprisingly gentle as he picked me up and turned me around and a few seconds later he was sitting with his back to the headboard and me in his lap and I was curled up like a fucking child.

I hated it.

And I loved it.

I swallowed against the tears because I wasso happyhe was there and even though it didn’t look like it. But a shudder rolled down my spine when I tried to keep it in and Sam gave a low growl and hugged me tighter, kissing my hair.

“Let it out, babe,” he whispered in my ear. “Just let it go. Say what you need to say—whatever’s true. I’m here. I’ll listen. No judgment.”

That was the last straw. I was done. Iwailed.

It was so dumb. The whole time I babbled at him about my father, and Christmas, and the court case, and being apart from him, and wanting him, but being scared of needing him, and how what usually worked wasn’t working and I’d been scared of that which was why I’d gone looking for him in the first place and…

And…

And…

And through it all, he just held me. Stroked my hair. Grunted a few times when I talked about a fear, or a pain. And when I stopped talking, he just murmured my name and told me he loved me and we’d get through it.

But every time he said that my head screamed,what if we don’t?

Andit’s my fault!

Andno one believes me!

I’d never regretted my past before. Notreally.There were choices I’d make differently. People I wouldn’t touch—like the knife guy. But I’d neverreallyregretted my choices, or the reckless ways I’d lived because they got me through.

But now?

No one trusted my judgment.

Everyone thought I was delusional and unhinged.

No one wouldlisten.

I told him that too. And he nodded. “I know.”

“Thank you, Sam,” I wept, burying my face under his jaw. “Thank you forlistening.”

“Oh, babe…” his voice was ragged, like he might cry too and that just made me cry more.

I don’t know how long we sat there. But he never stopped stroking me. And he never tired. At some point my sobs turned to hiccups, then to deep breaths that hitched. Then… then I was just laying there with him. Wide awake. Eyes aching. Body exhausted. Mind still spinning but… it was like my thoughts had lost momentum.

The fear was still there, but more distant. A threat to come, rather than an intruder in my home.

I sighed and Sam squeezed me. His lips were moving. He’d been sitting there talking? Silently?

Praying.

I hoped it helped him. He needed help. Hedeservedhelp. I wished I could help him more.

I must have said something because he gave a little huff and shook his head, kissing my hair. “Babe, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“That’s impossible.”

“No, it’s not.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, except. “You’re better.”

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