Page 116 of Yes No Maybe

“No.” It comes out emphatically as my story mixes with Rowan’s words to Mira.No one wants to be alone.But Devin catches my eye, looking more serious than usual as he cocks his head at me. With an uneasy shrug, I reconsider. “He’ll resist happiness at first. If his brother can’t have a happy life, why should he? He’ll try to say he’s notthatguy, that he’s better off alone. He’ll believe it, too. It’s easier being alone. Not letting anyone else in means…”

My brow pinches as I see where this is going.

“Means what?” Devin pushes.

“Nothing changes, and he never gets hurt again. He’ll hold on to his brother and his misery, keeping them both in limbo.”

Devin leans into the plush red chair, hands latched behind his head. “Until…dun, dun, dun… what happens?”

“Until he meets someone who—” A smile slips up my lips as I think about her. “Brings him out of his misery. Then, loving the right person matters more than the risk, heals the emptiness left by his brother, and…”

“He doesn’t need him anymore.”

Air evacuates my lungs like I’ve been jabbed in the stomach. He’s right—I don’t need him anymore. Not that he’s really here in the first place. He’s definitely a welcome character in my overactive imagination. But, if he really were here, he’d tell me not to hang onto my grief anymore—that’s not the damn takeaway from Devin’s short life. To love and be loved—that’s what he taught me.

And that’s what I have now, too.

Devin rises from my reading chair. “It’s like me and Corey used to tell you—three’s a crowd.”

I laugh—he said that a lot. Though I’m bubbling with ideas, I minimize the tab forStrangers Together—that’s not what I’m writing today.

Devin cracks his fingers at the same time I do. “Well, I’ll leave you to it. I have a hot elf to ravish.”

I laugh and open a new document that I hope will make it a little easier for the woman I love to do what she loves.

And the next time I glance up from my keyboard, Devin is gone.

Thirty-Nine

Rowan

MomcrieswhenIshow up with Jack at Reggie’s oceanfront rental two nights later. Like,seriouslycries. Especially when Jack tells her, “I’ve changed her mind about romance. You owe me dinner, Christine.”

She enthusiastically obliges. Mira, Jane, and the kids join us, and everyone dotes on Jack like they’re desperate to secure his place in our family. It’s a little embarrassing, but he seems to like it. The bad weather coming over the weekend has prompted Mom and Reggie to move up their travel plans—they leave Thursday. Typically, news like this would have Mom teary about leaving us early.

Not this time. She has Reggie. And she’s leaving me with Jack.

Friday morning, I pick Sara up for school with the top down. She tosses her backpack into the backseat before waving the newspaper.

“You won’t believe what’s in the paper today.” She looks almost purple with giddiness, but it could be her hair reflecting onto her cheeks.

“You read the paper?”

She scoffs. “No, Dad likes keeping up with the police blotter in case his relatives are arrested.”

“Oh, has someone been arrested?” I twist to back out of her driveway.

“Look at this.” She holds up the paper, forcing me to hit the brakes before pulling out. It’s a grainy black-and-white photo of Jack.Guest Columnistis listed under his name next to the title of his piece.Romancing the Learning Curve.

My mouth goes bone dry in nervous anticipation. “He didn’t tell me he was writing for the paper. What does it say?”

“Ah, it’ssogood, Rowan. He talks about his awesome class visit, your Inspiration Project, and how giving teenagers more freedom has improved their learning. He quotes Julio, Eddie, and Mia. He says teenagers aren’t the moody, shallow, disinterested jerks older people often judge them to be. If given the right tools, encouragement, and trust, there’s nothing teenagers can’t do. He rants about teacher salaries. He talks about your student pantry and that if we seriously can’t pay teachers what they deserve, then at the very least, the community should get off its ass and provide supplies. He calls you—get this—‘a modern-day Elizabeth Bennett, an intelligent forward-thinker, under-resourced thanks to society, but still bucking against the boring rigamarole of lectures and multiple-choice tests to give her students what they really need—space to fall in love with learning.’”

I scoff while blushing. “If I were his teacher, I’d take off points for hyperbole.”

“He challenges teachers to let go of rigid lesson plans and remember what they once loved about learning—and businesses, communities, and leaders to be supporters rather than critics. Seriously, Rowan, it’s the best article I’ve ever read. He’ssoin love with you.”

I meet her coy grin with a light shrug. “Um, it sounds… amazing.”

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