Page 101 of Yes No Maybe

They share their stories, and we linger at the dinner table long after the leftovers go cold to hear them. They are full of laughter and hope and beautiful familiarity—this is exactly what I’ve always wanted for her.

For me, too.

It’s late when everyone disbands. Mira and the family go home, and though she argues, I insist Mom goes with Reggie. He’s rented a beach cottage for his stay, and there’s no reason why she shouldn’t be with him.

“I’m fine,” I tell her for the millionth time.

And it’s true—I realize, reentering the little house. Mom and Reggie’s connection makes me think of mine with Jack. He touches me like that. We laugh like that. He’s willing to give up the house he lovesfor me. He’s spending the day with my students tomorrowfor me. The confused fog I’ve been in finally breaks.

Sara’s painting holds me captive once again—Jack and I in our ghost forms coming together—that’swhat I want. His creative brain. His bookish tattoos. His perfect kisses. And the way he sees right through me. He is where I belong.

It’s late, but I don’t care. I slip out the sliding glass door and race along our houses, barefoot and breathless.

My feet skirt up the deck planks with light thuds. Goosebumps cover my arms from the chill night air and probably from what I’m doing, too.Am I really doing this?

Yes. Most definitely, yes.

Desperate to see him, I nearly trip over my feet. Under the drooping Edison bulbs and around the luxurious chaise, I rush by his dark office. Light spills onto the deck planks from his living room and kitchen windows.

But shadows move inside, and voices slow me down.

Edging the first window, I peer inside, nervousness rising in my gut.That’sa woman’s voice. My eyes lock in breathless disbelief—Jack with Dr. Evelyn Tate.

He leans against the kitchen counter, drink in hand, hair disheveled—he looks amused. She’s perched on a barstool, a tight, black dress hiked up on her thigh. She looks nothing like she does at school. Her head tilts back, laughing, and she raises her glass to him. Behind the island, she makes herself at home by kicking off her heels.

My stomach twists into jagged knots—I might be sick.Evelyn… Evie. His first love. His muse.

The woman he’ll never turn away.

All smiles, they chat, probably about their amazing sex or equally hot, flawless bodies. Jack gives her a sheepish grin, folding his arms over his chest. She leaves her seat, slowly, seductively making her way to him.

I twist away. I can’t watch.

I’ve been such a fool.Again.

Hand over my mouth to keep me from screaming, I return the way I came, determined to shield myself in the little house and have my breakdown privately. I’m not just hurt—I’m devastated. But no good can come from a confrontation, especially not for me at work. And what’s the point, anyway?

I knew who Jack Graham was from the beginning, and he’s proven me right. I will never be enough for him. And he’s not enough for me, either.

Thirty-Four

Rowan

Jackanswershisfrontdoor, smiling wide when he sees me. He’s wearing a white towel wrapped loosely around his waist becauseof course, he is. Ihatethat my eyes wander over him like I’m on an exploratory adventure. His wet hair drips onto his face, clean-shaven for once—he’s made an effort. Shame it’s for nothing.

“Rowan, hey, I’m almost ready. Want to ride together?”

Game face, Rowan.“No. I only have a minute.”

My forced smile makes his brow pinch. “What’s wrong?”

I take a breath, and my plan falters. The short but direct speech I prepared seemed like the right idea,in theory. I had all night to work it out and affix the calm, unshakable demeanor I needed to deliver it. I hold his manuscript in my arm and my keys in my hand. My bag and a travel mug of coffee await me in my VW—I’m ready for a quick exit. I’m determined to minimize the damage and hold myself together.

All I have to do is say what I need to say and be done with it.Quickly.But my strength wobbles unsteadily.

“Want to come in?” He motions inside, but I shake my head.

I glance around him, almost expecting to see her, even though her BMW accelerated down Daisy Lane two hours after spying them together, taking what remained of my hope and dignity with her.

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