Page 29 of Love in Focus

“Yeah,” I say softly. “Wait, so what happened?”

Val laughs, so loudly and unexpectedly that I jump. “Well, after talking through a bunch of stuff, we went back and realized the rules we established for ourselves in the beginning of our relationship were bullshit. And we learned that we need to just let each other be who we are, instead of trying to change ourselves or each other. Sure, we make sure to regularly do things together, but we’ve also been doing things separately ever since, and it’s workedbeautifully.”

I stare down at my hands, wondering if that’s where Iwent wrong with James. I’d been so busy with my work atHorizon, givingotherpeople advice or telling them about the best romantic date spots in town, that I took the back seat in my own relationship. Things were so much easier when I followed James’s lead, doing whatever he wanted to do. That is, before he led our relationship into a gaping black hole.

Val jumps off the couch and lets out a big roar of triumph. “Yeah! Take that, Dragonlord Placidusax!”

Startled, I make a face, looking up at the screen in time to see the two-headed dragon disintegrate and blow away in a cloud of dust. “Is that really the dragon’s name?”

“Thelatedragon’s name,” Val answers proudly.

Sure enough,DRAGONLORD PLACIDUSAXflashes as an achievement trophy on the TV.

Grinning widely like… well, someone that’s just beaten a challenging video game level… Val sets her controller down and grabs an uneaten pizza crust.

As she eats, she glances over at my face and does a double take.

“Oh, no,” she says. “You’re thinking of James, aren’t you? Honestly, fuck that guy. I didn’t tell you all this so you’d feel bad about the past. What I wanted to say is… hell is trying to control people, including yourself. Be nicer to yourself, and let you be you, and let Celeste be herself. If you guys end up taking this further than a business relationship, great. If not, that’s fine, too. Don’t try to force the hand in either direction. Just be sure you know whatyouwant.”

At that moment, the front door unlocks and Kiara walks in, a wine-dazed smile on her face. Burrito shoots out from the bedroom, greeting her with joyful meows.

“Babe!” Val leaps up from Clementine to give Kiara a big hug.

“Aw, babies!” Kiara scoops up Burrito and squeezes Val tight. “I missed you two!”

My friends kiss each other, and I grin.

If that isn’t true love, I don’t know what is.

On Sunday morning, a full two hours before Celeste and I are supposed to meet, I arrive at Peter’s, a nice coffeehouse that Val, Kiara, and I stop at often since it’s only a five-minute walk from their place. As locations go, I figure it’s the best option, since it’s a brightly lit, wide-open space, pretty much the opposite of the dark and cramped places I’ve been meeting Celeste outside of work lately. It also has such a nice, productive vibe that I hope will help us stay on track.

It’s foggy and cloudy today, and there’s enough moisture in the air that I bring an umbrella in case it rains. But that doesn’t deter people from being out and about. Traffic is bustling, and even from inside the coffeehouse, I can hear honking cars and sirens passing by.

I put on my earbuds and get started on work. The first thing I do is go over the footage and photos that Celestesent me. As I review everything, I have to admit that it all works perfectly. The lighting, the angles, and the editing…

Celeste managed to set up all the components of the shoot flawlessly in a way that makes everything from Case’s rainbow-colored hair to even finer details like Will’s dimples really shine through the cameras. And she’s already edited out all the unnatural pauses and other awkward instances that occurred while the kids were speaking.

I’m finishing up the transcription of the second interview when Celeste arrives at 10:55 a.m., five minutes earlier than our scheduled meeting time. She sits down across the table from me and wordlessly watches as I type.

Before I begin a new line of dialogue, I pause the video and glance up from my screen just briefly enough to see that today, Celeste is wearing a nice white blouse with a turned-down collar and black square glasses that makes her look like a sexy schoolteacher. Intentionally or not, she’s perfectly executed the hot nerd look.

“Hey,” I say. “Sorry, let me finish this up before we start talking.”

Celeste shrugs. “No worries. I came early.”

She continues watching me work, and although I can’t see her face, the knowledge that she’s observing me is enough for my fingers to make typos they normally don’t, like spelling “girlfriend”girlfiend. I clear my throat, ignoring the heat rising up in my cheeks.

“Sorry, can you not look at me while I work?” I ask. “It’s distracting.”

When I glance up again, Celeste’s slightly widened eyesare blinking rapidly. “Oh, sure. Sorry, I didn’t think—I’m going to go get myself a coffee.”

As she hastily gets up and goes to stand in line at the register, I stare at her back in confusion. What happened? Why was she so flustered?

And then, I realize. After making sure Celeste still has her back turned toward me, I look at myself in my phone’s selfie camera.

Since I don’t have time to think much about how I look before hopping on the Muni in the morning during weekdays, I usually throw on whatever’s clean and don’t even bother with anything other than sunscreen. On weekends, though, I like to dress up and wear makeup, simply because I have more time to do so.

Both times I’d last seen Celeste, I’d been wearing my usual work outfits. This is the first time Celeste has seen me in full makeup and a dress since college. Granted, there could be a whole other reason why she’s acting like this. But even the slightest possibility of her becoming this worked up about me looking nicer than usual makes me blush even harder.

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