Page 219 of Beautiful Venom

“I never used or betrayed you. Technically, I didn’t lie to you either.”

His words clash with the wind and slap me across the face.

I think I’m really going to stab him this time.

“So your knowing about Violet, about the reason why I even approached you, is not a lie? Toying with me while you knew everything wasnotusing me?”

“It’s not.” He spills out a harsh breath, his chest straining against his cardigan. “I never toyed with you. Do you believe I’d be with someone as difficult as you if I weretoyingwith you? Do you think I liked it when you were trying to figure me out? When you put your nose in my business and tried everything under the sun to make me lose control? Ihatedit. I hated it so much, it messed with my head. I tried to keep my distance and discard you, but we wouldn’t be here if I’d succeeded. So no, Dahlia. There was no using or betrayal involved. I decided to keep you after that time I fucked you on the hood of my car. Nothing and no one will change that. Not even you.”

Fire bubbles up my spine and a ticking time bomb launches a countdown in my head.

Tick.

Tick.

Every tick is shoving me closer to the edge.

“Are you even sorry about your lies? Your omission of the truth?” I bang a hand against my chest. “Itrustedyou. I fucking trusted you, and you stomped all over it.”

“I didn’t choose for Violet to be Jude’s target.”

“But you chose to give him her file! You chose to exchange the results of the DNA found under her nails.”

“I didn’t know her or you at the time. Besides, he would’ve found her whether or not I was involved.”

Those are the exact words Vi said and I hate it. I hate that they’re both pushing me into a corner.

I hate that everything I did over the past few months was for nothing.

But what I hate the most is giving my heart for the first time, and to this bastard of all people.

“Did you stalk her, then? Were you one of the people who made her life hell prior to the attack for your precious friend?”

“No on all accounts. I haven’t been involved with Violet since the time I took Jude to your old neighborhood in Stantonville, and I have no knowledge of what transpired between them prior to what happened to her.”

“Andwhatexactly happened to her?”

“I take it that she didn’t tell you herself. In that case, I won’t either. It’s not my story to tell.”

I grind my teeth. The fact that he knows what the hell happened and I don’t is driving me insane. No matter how much I beg Vi to tell me, she just shuts down.

I inhale deeply, my chest inflating with so many pent-up emotions. “Let’s say you didn’t know me when all this started. Then what about after? Hmm? Why did you talk to me that first time in the arena and give me hope that I could join Vencor? What about then?”

He runs a hand through his hair, tense, unlike his usual composed self. “You captured my interest.”

“What?”

“That day, the first time I saw you in that unsightly neighborhood, I wanted to see you again. I made myself think I wanted to protect you from Jude, which is why I made arrangements for you to be offered a scholarship into GU. It’s why I put on the whole show about the initiation.”

“A show where you showed me my worst nightmare and fucked me like a beast on the ground?”

“I won’t make excuses for that. I didn’t truly know you at the time and I had to make it convincing, and while I’d never psychologically torture you if I could get a redo, I still enjoyed the sex, as I know you did. I truly am sorry about digging up your childhood trauma, I don’t want to hurt you and I feel bad about that, especially after seeing how much it affected you. Truth is, I’d wanted to own you since I first saw you, and I foolishly thought fucking you once would be enough. It wasn’t. All that first time managed to do was unleash the animal lurking inside me. In reality, I wanted you in my space. Selfishly. Even if I had to make you think you’d possibly get into Vencor. It didn’t matter as long as you didn’t get close to anyone but me.”

My lips tremble.

My whole body does.

Sweat covers my palms, and I swipe them against my jeans, hoping this whole thing will go away.