Page 98 of The Sinner: James

“Yeah, they would. But in my case, my parents would say I’m too young, and James only wants to sleep with me. And even if he doesn’t, he’s not marriage material. And I’d be living on the edge with him. That sort of thing. Besides, it’s all true. The man doesn’t believe in love and, sure enough, is not interested in marriage. Not now, and not ever. Not with me or someone else. And to be honest, I’m not interested either.”

Her mouth falls open as she looks at me, perplexed.

“But why?”

I look away, shrugging.

“I don’t know. It’s how I feel.”

I move my gaze back to her.

She can’t make much sense of my words.

“So, anyway…” I continue. “To my parents and my sister, I’d be nothing but a young, stupid slut. Maybe my parents wouldn’t put it that way, but they would think it anyway.”

“What about your dear sister? She slept around quite a bit, and they’ve never had a problem with it.”

“Yeah, she did. But she married a man they both liked. Someone who is marriage material. Plus, she’s in college. Once all is said and done, she’ll be back home, get a good job in the finance industry, have a couple of kids, and live happily ever after.”

“I don’t know what to say... Your parents seem open-minded and laid back.”

“They are good as long as I don’t cross lines with them.”

“But you didn’t even try to talk to them.”

“Talk what? Tell them I plan to live with James Sexton in his mansion, be there for him whenever he comes back from the office, his business trips, or his nightclub? And then what? Live off his money? What would that make me if not a whore on a retainer?”

“Damnit... Rain. I don’t even know what to say. So what do you plan to do? What did you tell him?”

“I told him I can’t start a feud with my family, and he understood. He’s not a fan of drama, anyway. He has a life and doesn’t want to get caught in the shit storm threatening my life. Spending time at his place was only possible when my family was out of town, but now they’re back. I can’t leave my place in the evenings. And I can’t spend the nights out. He’s busy during the day.”

Walls of panic grow around me.

She mulls over my words.

“It sucks. I don’t know what to say. He’s probably the only one who can help you,” she says.

I shake my head.

“No, he can’t. And I don’t want his help or to be the woman who depends on him. He’d get bored with me, and he might get bored anyway. Plus, where would that leave me if it all ends at some point? Back with my parents? Starting from scratch away from home?”

16

JAMES

“Sneaky motherfucker.”

“Shut up, Lex. You would’ve done the same thing,” I retort, clutching the steering wheel, my eyes rooted to the road.

The windows go down, the evening breeze blowing in my hair, specks of light flying off my cigarette.

The temperature is mild, and the smell of grass and flowers lifting from the meadows is intoxicating.

“You could’ve told us.”

“Yeah... Like it was hard to figure it out.”

“What did he do?” Ed chimes in from the backseat, typing a message on his phone.

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