Page 186 of The Sinner: James

If he’s ever fantasized about me touching him, I’m sure this is not what he had in mind.

Not with James observing my every move.

He feels like a volcano ready to erupt with his heated stare, boiling anger, and fire oozing from his blood.

I’m sure James thought I’d never go through with it. Never let them do this to me.

But there’s something he doesn’t know. Something I’ve learned from him.

You always have to push through in order to survive. There are no ifs and buts or taking steps back under no circumstances.

You do that, and you’re dead.

They eat you alive, push you to the side, and walk all over you. You never get the chance to pull yourself up.

Had I backed away back in the day, he would’ve never looked at me twice.

Right now, he’s stirred up because I still matter to him. He wants vengeance more than anything else.

He wants to crush me, and there’s hate in him that needs to be fed. And I can surely feed it.

Had I pulled away from this, he would’ve freed himself from me. And I would’ve meant nothing to him.

He would’ve lost respect for me.

I would’ve been just another girl who cowered in a corner every time the past had brought the memory of him to her.

He would’ve seen a woman with a broken heart who’d never been his equal.

And he would’ve been disappointed, had a bad taste in his mouth, and never considered giving me a second chance.

A second look.

So there.

Without breaking my stare, I run my hand between Lex’s legs, cup his bulge, and palm his big cock through his pants, his flesh swelling against my hand.

Raw hunger flashes through his eyes.

I push up to my feet when James grips my shoulder and jerks me back down.

“Don’t even fucking try to kiss him,” he says, sliding his hand into my hair and keeping me in place.

Expressionless, Lex takes his jacket off and tosses it on a nearby chair while I unfasten his belt, work his fly open, and free his cock.

My gaze stays glued to his erection before flicking my eyes up and holding his stare.

A smile dips his lips, his mind blocking James out completely, the same way mine does.

I wrap my fingers around his girth before sliding my fist up and down, a sultry look on my face.

He bites his lip again, feeling exactly what I feel, understanding what I do, and willing to fight a war if needed to keep this going on.

He loves it.

Regardless of how twisted, dark, and fragile it is, he loves my touch, my eyes. My body.

He also loves this growing secret between us.

---