Page 68 of The Sinner: James

“And you know why? It’s not because they fell in love with the people they fucked behind their spouses’ backs. It’s because they’re sick and tired of love. They’ve had it for years at home. And in time, it had turned into endless conversations about money, savings, furniture, doctor visits, and kids. It became schedules, lists, and a bunch of obligations. It became boring sex or no sex at all. Suppose it’s ever been about sex. That’s what love is, sweetheart. They have it at home. They bought into the myth, and now they live the harsh reality of it. And guess what? It sucked the life out of them and made them lazy and cranky, and oblivious to anything around them. It turned them into a bunch of jerks who don’t want to have anything to do with ‘love.’ All they want is to have their dick sucked in one of Red’s rooms. No questions asked, no conversations, and sure as hell, no expectations. That’s what love is in real life.”

She looks at me, her eyes sparkling with emotion.

It feels as if I just put my boots into a bunch of blooming flowers.

I move my eyes away from her.

“This is Lex’s place,” I say, pointing to a big gate that slides open.

She hides her eyes as she turns left and looks out the window.

We pull in, the silence thick between us.

Lex and Ed head to the car, dressed in jeans, T-shirts, and boots.

I step out so they can swoop in before I sink back into my seat. Their cheers crush the silence as they lay their eyes on her.

“Take it easy, for fuck’s sake,” I say, laughing as they fall back in their seats.

Rain’s eyes are draped in sadness.

“Look who’s driving,” Ed says, sticking his head between Rain and me.

Cupping her face with one hand, he kisses her cheek.

Growling, she pushes him back.

He tilts back in his seat, chuckling.

“What’s up with the bad mood?”

“Girls have bad moods all the time, Ed. That’s fucking basic. You should’ve learned that by now.”

“Sorry. I’ve never stuck around long enough to learn about their moods.”

They both laugh as Rain throws me a glare before glowering at them in the rear mirror.

“It’s okay, babe. You’ll get used to us,” Lex says, curling his fingers around Rain’s shoulder.

She shudders.

“Enough, Lex,” I say, glancing at her. “You can slap him, honey, whenever you want,” I say, locking her eyes briefly.

A soft smile shines through them.

“Where are we going now?” she asks.

“To show you something.”

11

RAIN

We leavethe estates behind and drive back to the main route before heading north through a small neighboring town.

Their voices fade in the background while James’ words still echo in my ears.

It’s hard to say what saddens me the most.

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