Page 190 of The Faking Game

Lucky.

I’m the one who’s lucky, and too much of a bastard to let Nora go. She offered marriage because it’s what I need, not because she’s ready for it. She hasn’t even been in a relationship before.

Over and over again, she’s said that she wants to learn how to date, to let guys in, to be in a relationship. To stop being afraid and one day find true love. Getting shackled to me wasn’t on her list of goals.

But I’ve seen just how kind she is.

Kind enough to offer to marry a man she likes, a man she trusts, just to make his life easier. Kind enough to tell herself she might even like it. Might even be a nice, neat solution.

And I’m enough of a bastard to have accepted it when she offered because I want her that badly. Because I’m willing to have her, even without her love, even knowing that she offered just to do me a favor.

I tuck the pear-shaped engagement ring into my back pocket, but I don’t give it to her when I see her that evening. I can’t bring myself to.

Every time I see her, every time I hold her, it’s torture. Knowing that she doesn’t feel like I do.

Alex sends me a delivery a day later. It’s a giant box of magnum condoms, along with a note that makes it clear he’s spoken to Rafe.

I’m too young to become an uncle again. Magnum was generous of me, which I want noted. Happy for you. You took a risk with this. I approve. Burn this note after reading, though, and don’t tell Rafe. I’m playing both sides here. You get it.

I do get it.

This could blow up so much more than just my relationship with Rafe. It could destroy the group.

The diamond ring stays in my pocket. And it burns. I feel like I’m drowning in the want of it. Of her beside me. Of the promise of a forever with her.

Of more nights, more days, of her sketching on the lawn and gripping my hand on flights and the small moments, us at dinner, her teasing, her smiles.

I want it so fucking much, and she’s doing me afavor.I know her well enough to know that she puts other people’s needs ahead of her own as easily as breathing. It’s what she’s always done. And I never wanted her to do it for me.

The guilt is acidic. It hurts.

At least there are things I can do for her. Things that need handling, and Ben Wilde is high on that list.

Rafe wanted to handle him quietly. That was never my strategy.

He’s going to hate me for this, too, but he already hates me. What’s one more reason if it’s one that will keep Nora safe? Wilde needs to know that he’s done playing this game. That we’re going to come after him with everything we’ve got and it’s not going to be pretty.

My team has gotten intel that he’s throwing a party in the Hamptons, so I spend the afternoon driving the surrounding streets. Scoping out the place. Scoring an invite shouldn’t be difficult, but I don’t want any trace of my name on the list.

I’m driving up a curved tree-lined street when my phone rings. It’s not Nora. It’s not Rafe.

I sigh but hit answer. “Hello, Mom.”

She tells me about the thank-you cards she’s been signing all morning from the Spring Ball and how the bartender wasn’t up to par. I do my best to make it seem like I give a single fuck.

“Is there something I can help you with?” I ask.

“Can’t I just call to chat with my son?” she asks. “But yes, there is. Nora. You’ve been dating for a while now, and you’re only three months out from your thirtieth birthday.”

“I’m aware.”

“Have you asked her to marry you yet? I have a caterer on hold for the weekend before your birthday. I booked them over a year ago; they do fantastic roasted lamb.”

I close my eyes. “Mom.”

“Have the two of you discussed it? I may not live at Fairhaven anymore, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it to remain yours. To be passed down to your kids. It can’t be torn apart.” She takes a deep breath. “I don’t understand this, Weston. You’ve known about this for two years. What do you have against marriage?”

That makes me laugh. “What do I have againstmarriage?”

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