Page 36 of Silos and Sabotage

Jordan’s gaze followed her hand worriedly. “You okay?”

“I am.” She quickly lowered her hand. “Thank you.” It was oddly comforting to know that she would be volunteering alongside a man who’d known her parentsback when they were first falling in love. Maybe he’d be able to shed some light on why their marriage hadn’t worked out.

And who’d wanted her father dead.

And what her mother was so afraid of now.

Chapter 7: Pretending

One week later

Ella felt a teensy bit guilty as Gage drove her to her second therapy appointment. Though he seemed to think she should welcome her biological mother into her life with open arms, she wasn’t ready to fully trust the woman yet. Instead, Ella was bracing herself for the biggest role-playing session in her life. She and Gage had done their homework, enough to know that a person suffering from anterograde amnesia would likely not remember much from her last psychiatric appointment. So that’s how she planned to play it today.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Gage looked like he was trying to mask his disapproval, but he wasn’t doing a very good job of it. “Dr. Avery Radcliffe doesn’t have so much as a speeding ticket on her record. I checked.”

“She was an absent mother for over twenty years.” That was the part Ella was having the most trouble getting over. She understood that marriages didn’t always work out, but that didn’t excuse a parent’s responsibility toward their child.

“She’s present now.” He drove her up to the plaza strip that housed her mother’s practice and managed to snag a streetside parking spot.

“Is she?” Ella wanted that more than anything. She truly did. That was the sticking point. She was afraid to give the woman a chance, because she was afraid of being rejected by her. Again. “I think the jury’s still out on that, since she’s refusing to acknowledge we’re related.”

“Only in public,” he reminded. “For safety reasons, according to her.”

“I’d rather keep my options open.” If he thought she was being uncharitable, well, she’d warned him she was a heathen. “The more she opens up to me, the more I’ll open up to her. That’s the best I can give her right now.”

“Or you could forgive her.” He stared straight ahead.

“Gage!” She wasn’t accustomed to his criticism. “Where is this coming from?”

“Personal experience in holding grudges.” He sounded troubled. “What I didn’t tell you about my adoptive mother was that she tried to put my younger brother in the foster care system after my adoptive dad died. She said it wasn’t fair to expect a woman her age to care for an energetic nine-year-old by herself.”

“What?” Ella gasped.

“That’s the real reason I applied for guardianship of Rock. I wasn’t sure if any court would grant that kind of legal responsibility to a deployable soldier, but your dad jumped in with his character reference. The fact that he was a Medal of Honor recipient undoubtedly carried some weight with the judge.”

“Oh, wow!” She could easily picture her dad doing something like that. He’d spent his entire life taking care of others.

Myself included.

“I was so mad at her, Ella. You don’t just flush a nine-year-old kid down the toilet because you’re too busy or too tired to be bothered. I was angry with her for months, but your dad helped me with that, too. He invited me to church. Introduced me to some really great people who helped me figure out the whole single parenting gig. They were really nice to Rock, too. Helped him get involved in a local football league. The most important takeaway was that they made us feel like we mattered again.”

“You matter to me!” She reached for his hand.

He threaded his fingers through hers. “You matter to me, too. A lot. That’s why I don’t want to see you walk down the same road I did. Holding on to my anger wasn’t good for me, and it certainly wasn’t good for Rock. Only after I forgave my adoptive mother was I able to truly move on with my life. Up until that point, I was stuck in a rut.”

“I hear what you’re saying,” she sighed, “but…”

“I’m not saying she deserves it, Ella. From the sound of things, she probably doesn’t.”

She burst out laughing. “Did you just contradict yourself?” It felt like he was back on her side, and that felt good.

His lips quirked upward. “It might sound like it on the surface, but it’s not. Forgiving others, even when they don’t deserve it, makes you feel better about things. It just does.”

She peeked at him from beneath her lashes. “Lemme guess. You’re not overly thrilled about the fact that I’m still mad at God, either.”

“You’re quick.” He gently squeezed her hand.

“And you’re already having visions of dragging me by my hair to church next Sunday?” He’d invited her yesterday, but she’d turned him down, then spent the rest of the day feeling bad about it.

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