Page 168 of The Wishing Game

"Sometimes... I wonder if you truly love me, or if I was just an escape for you."

"What?" My eyes flare open in shock.

"Maybe I fooled myself because I was so goddamn in love with you." His lips flatten in disappointment. "I thought that as long as I gave you space, you'd come back to me. When you finally accepted my proposal, I was over the moon thinkingfinally, she's ready to move on.But you're not, are you?" He pauses. "Are youevergoing to be ready?"

"Nikki... That's not true. You know that's not true. I love you," I tell him from the bottom of my heart, dragging myself closer to him even as my skin bleeds and peels off.

He shakes his head.

"Then how come you've never shown it to me before?"

My mouth hangs open as I simply stare at him.

"I—" I drift off, not knowing how to answer. Heisright. I've been so wrapped up in my grief I've never once stopped to consider howhemight be feeling.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, lowering my head in shame. "You're right. I've been horrible to you. Iamhorrible to you right now when you don't deserve this—you don't deserve any of this. I know it's not what you signed up for and?—"

"Stop right there," he interrupts me.

I slowly look up to see him come closer to me, kneeling next to me.

"Youare what I signed up for.Allof you, Luce. I just wish you wouldn't shut me out. Let me share your pain. Let me help you through it," he whispers, his features softening.

My lips tremble as I cup his face in my palms.

"It's not just that, Nikki," I tell him sincerely. "I think I'm...damaged," I confess. It takes everything in me to admit this since I've barely had the courage to admit it to myself. But as much as I can put the fault on my grief, I know there's more. There's the deepest issue and the fact that I don't think I deserve him.

"What?" he barks, his eyes flashing at me.

"Look at me," I say with a quivering smile.

"I am. You'll always be the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, Luce."

I shake my head at him.

Bringing my hands to my bodice, I pull on the lace until it gives way, shattering to reveal the marked skin beneath. But I don't stop at that. Picking up a sharp piece of glass, I continue to rip and cut into the dress until it falls from my body. Until I'm naked in front of him—bare for the first time ever.

He may have seen some of my marks. But he hasn't seen the rest. He hasn't seen the scars that mar my skin, the rough bumps and the gnarly, red tissue that never healed properly.

"I can't look at myself and not see the past," I whisper. "I can't stand to look at my own self, so how could you?"

His features tighten as he wipes my tears away with his thumbs. But he doesn't look at my body. He only looks at me.

"Let me help you build a new past, present, and future. Let me love you until you love yourself, too, Luce. Just... Let me love you."

"But what if... What if I'm not enough?" I swallow a sob as I stare into his eyes, struck speechless by the unconditional love I see there.

"You'll always beeverything, Luce." He smiles at me. "I just hope I can be everything for you, too."

Tears trickle down my cheeks as I nod fervently.

He brings the rough pads of his fingers to my calves, trailing soft touches all over my skin until he reaches the bleeding wounds caused by the broken glass. He carefully plucks all the residual glass from my flesh before swooping me up in his arms. I don't question what he's doing or where he's taking me. I simply wrap my arms around his neck, burying my face in the crook of his shoulder and breathing in his familiar scent. My breathing evens out as my sobs subside. But as the fog over my mind starts to clear, embarrassment and regret fill me to the brim.

I tighten my grip on Nikki, wondering how I'm going to face him after my outburst. God... I've put him through hell, haven't I? I've made him suffer without even realizing it, and still, he's stayed by my side.

Nikki takes me to the adjacent bathroom and lays me in the bathtub. He turns the water on, making sure the temperature is perfect before he redirects his attention to me.

"Don't." He stops my hand when I try to cover myself. "You wanted me to see. So let me see," he murmurs, bringing the shower head to my skin and washing the blood away.