Page 96 of Bound By Threads
“You were the only place I ever felt safe. You’re my home.” My voice cracks again. “Let me come home.”
She doesn’t say anything at first, just stares at me like she’s trying to figure out if I’m real.
“I…” she starts.
“Just think about it?” I plead as I squeeze her hand. “I won’t force you. I’ll back off if you say no. I swear. If all you want is distance, I’ll give it to you. I’ll love you from afar… so far you won’t even know I’m there…”
Lottie huffs out a laugh—the sound more addictive than any drug I’ve ever taken.
She rolls her eyes and whispers, “You’re such an idiot.”
My heart pounds louder with each passing second, and I lean in, my breath catching, desperate to close the distance between us.
She stops me with a hand pressed to my chest. The distance between us feels like miles, and I can see the pain in her eyes… the pain I caused.
“You need to understand, Crew. It’s not simple like that,” she whispers, her fingers trembling as she touches me. “I’m with Archer… and Oscar. I can’t just?—”
My eyes lock onto hers, each word heavy with everything I’ve held inside. “I’m not asking you to choose,” I say, my voice rough, raw. “I don’t want you to pick between us. I just want to be with you. I have no right telling you that you can’t have them. I want to earn your forgiveness first. Keep getting revenge baby, it’s hot as fuck. Just.. just don’t count me out yet, yeah?”
I take another step, not wanting to make this harder for her, but unable to stay away. “I know I fucked up, and I hate myself for it. I don’t deserve you, but I’m willing to work to do whatever it takes to make it right. I want you, Lottie. All of you…” I wink at her. “Stripper and all.”
She rolls her eyes at me again, but her lips kick up at the side. She gently pushes me back.
“You don’t get it,” she says softly. I can’t just… have it all. I barely deserve them. I’m not going to keep adding to my collection like my seashells just because of a few pretty words.”
“Just think about it, yeah? I’ll leave you alone for now, I think I’ve overloaded you enough, but I won’t give up without a fight, Piglet…” I kiss her cheek, my lips lingering there for a moment. Then I step back, even as every cell in my body fights it.
I nod my head to the brooding one in the car. “Go to your boyfriend, Lottie. Tell him what I said, because this won’t work with secrets. Communication is key.” I wink again, then turn on my heel, not looking back so I don’t do something stupid.
I keep my head down, hands stuffed in my pockets, biting down the urge to turn around and see if she’s still watching me. If she’s still there with that storm in her eyes.
But I don’t turn back.
Not this time because if I do, I’ll break.
And I can’t break. Not when I’m so close to earning her forgiveness.
I don’t want to steal her from them. I only want the chance to love her too.
To mean something to her again.
She knows where I am now, what I want.
And if she lets me in… if she ever lets me come home?
I’ll never stop showing her that Ichooseher.
Chapter40
Lottie
By the time I climb into Archer’s car, I can still feel Crew’s words clinging to me like sweat after a set—hot, lingering, hard to shake. And it’s messing with my head.
Archer glances over at me, hand tight around the steering wheel. Oscar’s in the backseat, quiet, but I can feel his eyes on me in the rearview.
“You okay? Looked intense,” Archer says, glancing at me.
I nod, even though I’m not. “Said he was clean, and he looked like he was…”
