Page 96 of Riding the Edge

“I guess.”

“You—”

“I wanted to walk away,” he cuts me off. “I wanted to give my patch in and close the book on that chapter of my life, but I can’t.”

“You can’t,” I agree.

I don’t need a history lesson in the club to know for certain that Al is the pulse of the Satan’s Knights. Any encounter I’ve witnessed, he’s always been there at the front lines, ready to fight for what he loves…for what he believes. I’m just concerned as to why he’s just realizing this for himself.

“I gave my word to a brother, Lady," he says hoarsely. “I promised to intervene if his mind got the best of him. That day has come, and I can’t fucking do it. I can’t look him in the eye and tell him it’s time for him to step down.”

“Why not?”

“Because I gave you my word, and that takes precedence over everything and anything.”

Narrowing my eyes, I close the distance between us.

“I’m not understanding,” I tell him. “I told you I wouldn’t stand in the way of you and the club, Al, and like you’re a man of your word, well, I’m a woman of mine.”

“You didn’t sign up for this.”

“Sign up for what? You might’ve taken a hiatus from your club, but I always knew you’d go back. I’m also pretty sure you didn’t ask me out to dinner thinking I’d have a double mastectomy a month later,” I fire back.

“You don’t get it,” he grunts, shaking his head. “Jack has got to go, Lady, and Blackie can’t take his place anymore. If I tell Parrish it’s time for him to step down, they’re going to vote on who gets the gavel and all fingers are pointed to me.”

My eyes go wide as I realize what he’s saying. I won’t pretend to be some expert on outlaws. I have no idea what being the president of a motorcycle club entails, but I know a leader when I see one. I also know behind every successful man stands a strong woman, someone who pushes him and consoles him. A safe haven in a dark world, a place he can retreat to after the storm. A woman he calls his home.

“Yeah, now you’re getting it, Lady,” he mutters before turning his back to me.

All I’m getting is that this beautiful conflicted man is at the crossroads of his life with a decision to make. I think if I wasn’t in his life the choice would be easy. He’d take the path he was destined for. He’d fight, bleed and bend until he broke. He’d risk everything, lay down his life and do whatever necessary to save his brotherhood and abide by his oath.

Swallowing, I close the distance between us, touching a hand to his shoulder.

“Look at me, Al.”

He turns his head to the side.

“Do you not want the gavel?”

“I want you,” he replies simply, confirming my suspicions. “For fucks sake, Lady. I never got a lock on having a woman and my club. I’ve always lost when it comes to that and I won’t lose now. I won’t fucking lose you for a kingdom I was never supposed to have in the first place.”

“Who said anything about losing me?”

“Maria—”

“I asked you a question, Al.”

“You asked two,” he mutters.

“Do you want the gavel?”

“I don’t want my club to die,” he answers honestly.

“Then don’t let it.”

“It’s not that simple. It’s never been that simple, Lady,” he confessed. “If life has taught me anything it’s that a man can’t have everything,” he says, turning to me.

“What if just this once there was no choice? What if you got to have it all? The club, the family and the woman?”

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