Page 67 of The Tempted

Chapter Twenty-Three

Against my better judgment, I agreed to take Nikki out I just couldn’t say no to her no matter how hard I tried. I knew it was a shit thing to do going against Victor’s orders and all that, but to be fair, Jimmy had said that they were working on getting us home by tomorrow. We could possibly only have one night left here in Florida and I thought why not make the most of it. It was a stretch to think that Victor’s enemies would be here watching us when they had Victor to deal with. It wasn’t like I was taking her out to some grand place that everyone knew.

I had found a hole in the wall bar that served liquor and had a jukebox a bar just like Nikki had once told me she wanted to be taken too. My eyes did a quick sweep of our surroundings the bar was older than Aunt Gina (not quite as old as Nana) it was well kept and there wasn’t a big clientele. Aside from us, there were just a few couples in their forties swaying to some country song that blasted from the jukebox. We were completely out of place, but I seriously doubted that anyone looking for us would think to find us here.

I held out the bar stool for Nikki watching along with everyone else in the bar as she climbed onto the stool in the lace romper she was wearing. The shorts were short enough that her tanned legs were fully on display and it was cut very low giving me just the perfect hint of her cleavage. I couldn’t wait to peel the damn thing off her. I’d start by untying that little bow in the back of her neck that held the whole thing together and slide the wide sleeves down her arms. I could tell she wasn’t wearing a bra because I couldn’t see the straps of one through the lace.

Once she was fully seated on the stool I ushered her closer to the bar, brushed her wavy hair behind her shoulder, and leaned into her. A man could get drunk on the scent of her alone at least this man could.

“What do you want to drink”? I asked her as I pulled away from her before I embarrassed myself. I placed a kiss on the top of her head and turned around to get the bartender's attention.

“I’ll have a shot of tequila and a corona.”

I smiled widely as I signaled the bartender. “A woman after my own heart,” I winked at her as the bartender stepped to us.

“Is that all it takes to get to your heart?” she asked me softly. I didn’t have time to ponder her tone and whether she was kidding or actually if she was seriously asking me that question.

“What can I get you?” said the friendly bartender. What a difference from the service here to the service of the clubs in the city. This man was in his fifties and seemed genuinely happy to serve us not to mention Nikki didn’t have to flash her tits in his face to get his attention.

“Two Coronas and two shots of Patron, please,” I said.

“Coming right up,” he said before busying himself filling our order.

I turned my attention back towards Nikki. “Why Nikki you looking to nestle your way into my heart?”

Surprise registered in her eyes as she met my gaze. I raised an eyebrow towards her, daring her to answer.

The bartender placed our drinks in front of us on the bar and I reached into my pocket, pulling out a twenty and laying it on the bar.

“Keep the change,” I said as I handed Nikki her shot and took my own. She reached for the salt shaker taking my free hand in hers before pouring a little salt on my closed hand and did the same to her own.

“Avoiding the question?” I asked, watching her intently. I didn’t know why I wanted her to answer I was scared shitless that she’d say yes then what would I do. I wanted more than anything to be on the receiving end of her love more than I wanted my next breath, but I didn’t know what the fuck to do with that love once I had it.

“I’m giving you a pass Mikey take it,” she said as she licked the salt from her hand before tipping her head at me to do the same. I did as she had and licked the salt from my hand before clinking my shot glass to hers. We downed the shot of tequila simultaneously before taking the limes and sucking on them.

Nikki’s face scrunched up at the bitterness of the lime and she reached for her Corona taking a big gulp to wash away the foul taste from her mouth.

“I didn’t ask for a pass,” I said, reaching for my own beer. I should quit while I was ahead, but I had no sense anymore and continued to press her.

“Not verbally,” she turned to me leaning closer her index finger making a sweeping motion around my eyes. “But you said it loud and clear with those eyes of yours,” she cocked her head to the side. “Tell me something Mikey have you ever loved someone?”

Ah, shit. I couldn’t leave well enough alone now I was really fucked. I ran my fingers through my hair as I debated how to answer the question and if there was anyway, I could get out of it. I took another sip of my beer trying my damnedest to stall.

“Right,” she said reaching out to pat my cheek sympathetically, making me feel like I was a poor soul that was missing out on one of the great joys of life. Amazing how one little gesture could make a man feel so small. “Don’t worry Mikey if I learned anything from this mess it’s not to give my heart away so willingly anymore, so you have nothing to worry about.”

She lifted the beer bottle from the bar, bringing it to her lips, but before she could tilt her head back and take a sip I took the beer from her hand and placed it back on top of the bar.

“Dance with me?” I asked, swallowing hard trying not to sound so desperate. I may not be able to bring myself to speak what was on my mind and in my heart, but I could show her in other ways that I cared. It was a shitty consolation prize, but it’s all I had in me.

She paused a beat studying me before her lips curved into that sweet smile that seemed to own me. “Only if I get to pick the song.”

“Fair enough,” I said helping her off the stool and guiding her towards the jukebox. I dug into the pockets of my jeans and handed her a handful of quarters. She took them and flipped through the catalog of songs that the jukebox offered taking her time to select a song. I stared at her looking at her as if for the very first time trying to memorize everything about her.

A memory of the little girl I once thought of as a tagalong flashed through my mind reminding me that somewhere along the way she grew up to become the woman of my dreams. I wished I were the type of guy that deserved happiness that deserved someone like her in my life. I suddenly felt the urge to put my fist through something angry at the fact that the one thing I wanted more than anything was in arms reach and I still couldn’t reach out and take her.

She pointed to the screen of jukebox at the song she had chosen and I leaned forward, squinting to read the tiny lettering. The song was called If I Lose Myself by Corey Gray I had never heard this rendition of the song but I knew One Republic’s version. Something told me, Nikki was sending me a message by choosing this particular song for us and so when it started to play I played close attention to the words.

She took my hand and led me to the empty wooden dance floor. I wrapped my arms around her waist as she wrapped hers around my neck. She lifted her head, her eyes finding mine for a moment before laying her head on my shoulder. I kissed the top of her head and swayed along to the music listening as the song spoke of someone losing themselves to the person that was standing before them. The words of the song making me wonder if everything I’ve known my whole life to be about the heartache, the loss, and the constant sense of feeling like I’m inadequate if I could just let it all go. Would I be a better man? Could I rise above the labels I had self-imposed?

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