Page 469 of The Tempted

Or maybe that was his plan, maybe I was the detour, the unexpected turn in Riggs’ life. I was just a means to a cause. I was here to unite Riggs with Pea and that’s it.

God’s plan for me was to give them to one another.

As I pulled my hand away from my chest and looked at the blood coating my fingertips I was certain of it.

I felt the burning sensation in my chest; my heart physically felt as if it was being torn apart by the bullet and knew this was my ending and their beginning.

I love you Riggs.

Mommy loves you, Pea.

My eyes locked with Riggs’ before Bones came into my view charging at me and throwing me to the ground.

Heaven.

It’s not some grand garden, or a blissful oasis of clouds and I must’ve missed the pearly gates because it’s pretty dark where I am. I feel like I’m under water as I strain my ears to listen to the muffled sound of a baby crying.

Pea.

The cries are louder and this time I hear someone else’s husky voice cry my name.

Riggs.

They need me.

Me.

We passed the forty-eight-hour mark hours ago and Kitten still hadn’t opened her eyes. I’ve been going back and forth between the NICU and ICU, and I’m starting to lose it. Every time I look at our son, or hold him in my arms, I’m crushed because these are moments Lauren’s missing, moments that were robbed from her by a fucking bullet.

It wasn’t fair.

It was fucked up, so fucked up.

I paced her room, staring at the ventilator from the corner of my eye wishing like hell she’d wake up and that fucking noise would stop. It’s a noise that will haunt me for the rest of my life—that along with every fucking minute of the last few days.

I rubbed at the scruff that lined my jaw, knowing it was more like a premature beard than a five-o’clock shadow at this point.

“C’mon, Lauren,” I hissed. “Where’s the girl with the bat? Open those eyes of yours baby, come out swinging for me,” I pleaded.

Nothing.

Just that fucking machine.

I took my place beside her bed, dropping my head onto the mattress as I wrapped my hand around hers, trying to think of something else to say that would get her to come back to me. I’ve told her about the baby, I’ve told her how much I love her and I gave her a hundred different dreams we were going to fill when she woke up, and still I didn’t get to stare into those blue eyes thatownedme.

Then it came to me.

I lifted my head, reaching into my pocket for my phone and quickly thumbed through my camera roll to the videos. After Pea was fully taken off the ventilator and only had the feeding tube, I started videoing little things here and there so Lauren wouldn’t miss these moments. Like when he opened his eyes or when I caught him yawning and my absolute favorite was his cry. It was the most adorable sound my ears had ever heard. I brought my phone close to her ear, raising the volume before I pressed play.

Pea’s little cry filled the room and hopefully Lauren’s ears.

“Lauren, do you hear that? That’s your son, Kitten, your little boy,” I said, replaying the video again.

“He needs his mom,” I added.

“So do I…please, wake up, Lauren,” I begged. “Listen to him, listen to me, we need you, Kitten,” I rasped, watching intently as her eyelids twitched in response. “Lauren?”

My eyes traveled the length of her looking for another sign of movement. I took her hand in mine before diverting my eyes back to her face.

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