Page 68 of Disrespectfully, Relic

“Are you comparing me to Jessica?”

“She didn’t answer my calls and came around when she felt like it. That’s what you’re doing. Why’d you even tell me who you are if you don’t want to be a real dad?”

Jahleel stuck a thousand knives in Relic’s chest, serrating his decrepit heart with that accusation. His heart slowed to a feeble beat as he stared into Jahleel’s blurry eyes that gave away an impending break down. His son was seconds from crumbling, and Relic couldn’t summon the words to guarantee his worries were invalid because he’d never gotten that himself. The one parent he needed reassurance from had never given it, and watching Jahleel was like looking at a reflection of his inner self that he’d never shown to the world. Relic hadn’t realized the emotional damage Jessica had caused well before he came into the picture, but it left him with an even heavier burden of ensuring it didn’t ruin his fucking son.

“What do you need from me, huh?” Relic managed to keep his tone even as he ruffled the low curls on Jahleel’s head. “Tell me what I need to fix because I do want to be your dad, and I thought I was doing good at it, but maybe not.”

“You’re doing alright, but we got some stuff to work on.”

Relic’s head tipped back as a boisterous laugh shot from him. He hadn’t cracked up like that in a while nor had a peaceful rest since Jahleel hadn’t been around. His son had no clue how much he needed and missed him, too.

“Whatever you need me to do, I’ll do that shit, Jah. I’ll call every day, but you need to answer that goddamn phone I pay the bill on, even when you’re mad at me.”

“Stop cursing so much, and I will. I’m not ready to live with you yet, but you can get me on a weekday to hang out and take me school in the morning. I like coming over more than just the weekend. You gotta come to all my games, too.”

“I’ll come to as many as I can,” he counter offered before tacking on an incentive. “I’ll send Shabu or Titan to the ones that I miss.”

“Yea, do that. My uncles are cool and got money, so everyone will like them. I’ll tell them to bring the team snacks.”

Relic smiled through the lurch his heart made from his brothers receiving those esteemed titles while he hadn’t earned the one he should’ve gotten the moment he shot Jahleel out of his nut sack. The realization that he was nowhere near procuring it hurt worse than the bullet wound in his shoulder.

“Brother, the bus is here!”

His eyes wandered to Jasmine after she made that announcement while flagging a hand for Jahleel to hurry up. Relic stood and dug into his pocket for the few small bills he kept after learning that kids begged for money more than gold diggers. He peeled off two twenties to pass Jahleel.

“Give one to your sister. I have business to take care of, but I’ll be back a few hours after you’re out of school to pick you up. We can go do whatever you want and finish our talk. Sound good?”

“Yep! See you after school.”

Jahleel threw his arms around Relic’s waist and then removed them just as fast, taking off to the bus with his sister shuffling to keep up. Her bright smile, giggles, and barrettes bouncing as they raced took Relic’s mind to a place he couldn’t entertain since kids, a family of his own, and a normal life were out of the question for him. He didn’t waste time with dwelling over that glaring truth when fathering Jahleel was a task in itself. It made him vulnerable. It gave his opposition a direct shot at his heart without them having to get near him. The weight on his shoulders heavied at knowing he had to take that risk or deal with his son hating him for staying away.

A thunderous boom in the distance jolted him, sending his body into shock as he waited for a surge of pain to strike him like it had the night he’d been shot. Relic sucked in a breath and blinked, his eyes flitting around before landing on the door that Jahleel’s grandmother had slammed shut. He rolled his shoulders and tipped his head to ease his tension while trekking to his driver’s side to hop in. He’d been in the open for too long. After typing in his next destination’s address, he skirted off.

The discussion he’d intended to have with his son’s grandmother was placed on the backburner, especially since he couldn’t use his original tactic after his heartfelt talk with Jahleel. His son required as much love as possible, so whether or not he preferred it, the old bitch who hated his guts was an important factor in Jahleel’s upbringing. Relic didn’t possess the mental stability to play every role in his son’s life. If he could, he would do it with no remorse.

Jahleel stayed on his mind the entire drive to Kennedy’s house, while Jessica’s skeleton toggled his mental closet’s doorknob in an attempt to escape. Relic bounced between wishing he’d killed her ass himself for neglecting his son, to drowning in regret that she wasn’t around to give Jahleel the motherly love he deserved. The reality that his son’s final memories of Jessica were resentment filled didn’t sit well with him since he was the posterchild for the effect it had on one’s mental.

Relief washed over him when he pulled in front of Kennedy’s building and shut off his car. She was his biggest fucking distraction—one that kept him out of his head and calmed his skeletons as if hers wasn’t hidden among the dark carnage. He climbed out of his car, cemented a hand around his gun, and trudged up to her apartment with a pinch of frustration brewing at the fact she’d managed to settle a part of him that he struggled to control as of late. If his stomach weren’t growling from the heavy scent of food he smelled once nearing her door; he would’ve turned the fuck around and left.

Before Relic could knock, the door swung open to reveal Kennedy in a cropped hoodie, high-waist loose fitting jeans, and a designer scarf wrapped around a blunt short cut he liked because it didn’t hide her imperfections. His eyes darted to the ring camera he hadn’t noticed before he strolled past her to enter her place like he paid the bills.

“When did you get the camera?” he inquired, swiveling his gaze around her living room for other changes.

When he spotted none, his stare drifted toward the kitchen, noting the plate of food on the counter next to her laptop, phone, and a folder that made his lids narrow because it matched the ones he used for his businesses.

“Good morning to your rude ass, too. Tekken got it for me last week. Between him finding out I’m working for you and what went down at the club, he said I need to be more careful.”

“Smart man. What’d you cook?”

Kennedy shut and locked her door before padding barefoot into the kitchen where she was putting away the dishes she’d washed. She tossed her head at the plate, picking a fork to rinse and pass Relic as he sat on a barstool at her counter.

“Homemade French toast, eggs, bacon, and country style potatoes. That’s yours. I was about to wrap it up, but you’re early.”

“Shit, I’m on time if you ask me. Who told you to make this?”

“Damn, I couldn’t have made it for you out of the kindness of my heart?” Her arms folded in feigned offense, and Relic scooped a forkful of eggs into his mouth with his dull stare resting on her in disbelief. “Fine. Savvy told me what you like to eat and said I should cook to butter you up before we discuss business.”

“That’s what I thought. What business do we need to discuss?”

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