Page 45 of Perfect Mess

pretty sure don’t want to know

sleeping now, good night

MARY:

I know u r not sleeping bc you have been texting me 4 past 20 mins

NEW PAINTER:

bc phone won’t stop dinging

MARY:

u still have ding for text tone???

NEW PAINTER:

let me guess u have a schwing

MARY:

pro boner joke

funny

u r a real funny guy

NEW PAINTER:

seriously, going to bed

have to be somewhere in morning

Then I got an idea. Not just a good idea, a great one. Better than my hook up Janet at our high school reunion idea, better than my schedule a gynecology appointment with my high school crush idea, even better than drinking a full bucket of beer and throwing sharp axes in a cage. I texted Gary again.

MARY:

I will help u

There was another really long pause. Then the dots appeared. Disappeared. Appeared again.

NEW PAINTER:

u want to help me?

MARY:

we can make deal

I help u with pro boner job

pro boner

pro boner

pro boner

wtf

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