Page 68 of Poolside

“Doing good,” Chuck called when Tommy lifted his head for a moment to check his mark. “Keep it up.”

Tommy resumed swimming, but he began lifting his head to check his position more frequently. Chuck watched him carefully, noting that his strokes were speeding up.Shit.

They hadn’t quite made it to the halfway point when Tommy flipped over onto his back, arms working furiously at his sides to keep him afloat. His chest heaved and his breathing was audibly loud.

He started shaking his head. “I can’t,” he gasped.

Chuck stopped paddling. “Slow down your breathing, T,” he called.

“Fuck!”

His breathing wasn’t slowing down, and Chuck caught the exact moment when panic set in. Tommy’s breaths were labored and uneven, and it was obvious he was struggling to keep his head above the water.

One strong paddle had him at Tommy’s side, and he lowered himself to the deck to help Tommy lift his trembling body up onto the board. When it was clear that Tommy had a solid grip, Chuck sat back, shifting down the board so his legs dangled in the water to keep them balanced. “What happened?” he asked, placing his hand on Tommy’s shaking shoulder.

Tommy lifted his head from where it had slumped forward onto the textured surface of the paddle board. He pulled off his goggles, and shook the water from his face. “I panicked,” he admitted. “I just kept looking down and it’s so murky and creepy that I fucking panicked.”

Chuck could see the defeat in his furrowed brows and the anguished turn of his mouth. Tommy was an athlete just like he was. It wasn’t in their DNA to meet a physical task they couldn’t conquer, and Chuck could only imagine how the sting of that compounded with Tommy’s frustration.

“Let’s go back to the dock and chill,” Chuck offered. “We can swim around for a little bit and try again later.”

Tommy managed a nod. Chuck knew he could do it. He’d covered the distance in the pool without any problem, but Chuck also knew the adjustment to open water was one that could take time.

They’d take a break, and then they’d try again.

* * *

They spent the rest of the morning messing around in the water by the dock. Chuck was relieved to see the tension had faded from Tommy’s body as they climbed back up to the house for lunch. They were both flushed from the sun, and only bothered to pull on shorts over their suits as they made sandwiches in the kitchen.

Chuck kissed the back of Tommy’s neck just because he could, warmth filling him when Tommy reciprocated by pulling Chuck into his arms and pressing kisses to his neck.

He watched Tommy add chopped black olives to his sandwich without asking.

They went back to the couch on the deck with their sandwiches, sitting close enough that sweat gathered where their bare arms pressed together.

Chuck glanced over at Tommy. He was frowning down at the lake, staring out at the water like it had personally offended him. “What if you don’t do the swim?”

Tommy looked at him, affronted. “What?”

“Seriously. What if you don’t do it? What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I don’t think I’ll get the job,” Tommy said, setting down his sandwich and wiping his palms on his thighs. “I know it sounds nuts, but I think that, in Rick’s mind, the race is some fucked up metaphor for being a committed and driven employee.”

“Do you even want the job?”

“Of course I do.”

He watched Tommy, noting the deep groove between his brows. “Is it the money?”

Tommy huffed, shaking his head. “No. I make more than enough now.”

“Then what is it? You already work a ton. You’re already an upper level manager, and you have a bunch of employees who love you.”

“You wouldn’t get it.”

“Fuck off.” Chuck knocked Tommy’s thigh with his knee. “Tell me.”

Tommy let out a loud, labored sigh. “We’re in our mid-thirties, Chuck. We’re far along into our lives at this point. I had a marriage that was supposed to last forever, and that’s gone. I—I mean,wescrewed that up. Then there’s this job, which is the only other thing I’ve poured myself into. This job is all I have to show for the past ten years of my life. I don’t think I could stand it if I failed at that too.”

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