Page 32 of Redeeming the Villain

Oh shit, I think he just broke my nose.

Blood gushes from my nostrils, spilling to the floor. I cup my nose with my hands as he shoves me down to the hardwood.

“Great. Look at the mess you made. Clean it up,” he snaps, smacking me in the back of the head, making the pain throb even more. “And if anyone asks, you got hit during a game.”

He walks around and crouches before me.

“And what should I tell my teammates?” I ask, immediately regretting opening my mouth. I know better. I’ve learned from previous mistakes.

He grabs my jaw, squeezing tightly. I struggle to keep my hands around my nose to contain the blood as he pulls my head forward.

His spit flies from his mouth with his next words. “Tell them whatever it takes to keep them from the truth. And if someone comes to me with concerns, then Micah will get a matching nose.”

“No one will say anything.” I avoid his gaze, looking anywhere but at him. “I promise.”

He lightly slaps my cheek a few times. “Good.”

He stands up and strolls off with ease, as if what just happened was absolutely normal. But I suppose when it comes to our house, it is.

When I turn eighteen, Micah and I are going to run far away from here. Only a few more years to go.

I fly up in bed, clutching my neck as ragged breaths tear through my throat, leaving it raw. “Fuck!”

These never get easier. The nightmares. I’ve had them for as long as I can remember, but they’ve been worse since Alora got here.

I thought I was doing better. I mean, I have been since last year, but I’m starting to think that I just got better at hiding my pain, even from myself.

Micah’s face appears in my mind. I really thought we were going to get out of that house together and never imagined that I would be leaving alone.

A framed butterfly in the corner of my eye catches my attention, the sunshine reflecting off the glass from my open window.

One of the few things I kept from that house and one of the few things I have left of my brother.

Sitting up taller in bed, I grab the frame from my nightstand, gently cradling it in my hands as I bring it into my lap. The blue butterfly is so fragile and beautiful.

I can’t help but feel immense guilt every time I look at these, but they deserve to be seen—they were Micah’s. His collection that he kept hidden from our uncle. The butterflies were his most prized possession, and I … I made fun of him for it.

Something I’ll never forgive myself for.

I wish I could go back to that time and tell him how cool these were and how unique each one was, just like him.

I would give anything to change his frown to a smile.

My punishment for being cruel to Micah all those years ago is to be forced to live without him, knowing that I can never change the bad things I said to him.

My stomach turns at the thought of him. God, some days, I wish I could just forget this pain, live life with ease and without the weight of the world crushing down on my chest. Deep down, I think I deserve this agony.

Honestly, it’s a miracle I’ve gotten this far without him. But I definitely couldn’t have done it on my own. If it wasn’t for Darius and Alicia taking me in, I would’ve joined him a long time ago.

But I won’t let them down. For some godly reason, they believe in me more than anyone ever has. Selfishly proving that not everyone in the world has an agenda when it comes to love and trust.

So, as much as I don’t want to get out of bed right now, as much as I want to stay here and get lost for hours, staring at the preserved butterflies, I throw the comforter off of my legs and set the butterfly back on my nightstand before heading to the bathroom to shower before practice.

We have a quick morning skate today in preparation for tonight’s game against the Royals. My body is eager for the exertion.

It’s always been my outlet, my one place to unleash the pit of anguish inside of me without catching a felony for beating someone to a pulp. When I do it on the ice, everyone cheers.

And I’m sure that someone tonight will be lucky enough to feel my wrath. We’re playing against one of our rivals, and I know they’ll be out for blood. We beat them our last five matchups, and they’re desperate to break that streak.

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