Page 117 of Shadow

She cracked her eyelids open and peered at me for a moment before she took my hand. I breathed out as she tucked herself against my body.

“You leaving?” Devon asked.

“Yeah. It’s late,” I said, avoiding Lucy’s gaze.

“It was great to have you hang out. Don’t be a stranger,” he said.

“I won’t.” I grabbed Sirena’s coat and slid it onto her body before pulling mine on. I waved goodbye to everyone and escorted her out to the hall. I didn’t say anything to her until we left Devon’s building and were back in ours.

She seemed on edge and kept twisting her fingers together. I hadn’t even touched her on the walk back.

I felt like shit. Not because of the alcohol, but because I knew I wasn’t good enough for her. Everyone was right. I couldn’t compete with the watchers. I was going to look like a complete idiot with Sirena. I’d alreadyblownit twice. Fuck.

We made it into the room and took our coats off. She went into the bathroom and changed into a little black nightie that barely hit her thighs. I forced back a groan of want when she returned to the bed. I sat on the edge, and she stopped in front of me.

“What’s wrong?” She signed to me.

I stared at her momentarily before resting my hands on her hips.

“Did I do something wrong?” She continued to sign. “I can stay home next time. I don’t want to ruin your night out with friends?—”

I grabbed her hands and stopped her from signing.

“It’s not you, cupcake,” I said gently. “It’s me. I realized I don’t know shit about how-how to get through this.”

She blinked at me, confused.

“I can’t compete with Church and the guys,” I mumbled. “I’ve never had sex before. You saw how I-I came so fast. And I keep doing that. I’ve embarrassed myself twice with you, and I’m terrified the third time will make you realize how much I suck and how inexperienced I am.” I kissed her knuckles before continuing. “Lucy, she…she sort of asked me back to her room tonight. Sure thing and all that. The guys told me to go get some practice.” I looked up at her. “I’d never do that to you, Sirena. I just… I don’t want to be a disappointment.”

I released her hands and looked at the floor.

I didn’t know how she’d react to all that. Being with Lucy had never been an option tonight. I only wanted Sirena, but fuck, I guess I sort of knew how Sin felt with his self-loathing and all that.

Sirena went to her knees in front of me and tilted my face up. I locked eyes with hers for a moment before she leaned in and kissed me gently.

God, what she could do to me.

My dick hardened as she deepened the kiss. Her fingers moved to my shirt, which she unbuttoned and pushed it off my shoulders. I swallowed hard as she broke the kiss off and unbuttoned my pants.

“Sirena—”

She pressed her finger to my lips to silence me before she went back to removing my pants.

My body trembled at the thought of her soon seeing all of me. She tugged my pants off before hooking her fingers in my boxers.

“Sirena, cupcake, wait,” I said thickly, wrapping my hand around her wrist.

She stared up at me, looking so breathtaking that it took me a moment to collect my thoughts.

“I-I never asked you to be my girlfriend,” I whispered. “Will you? Be my girl?”

She leaned forward and kissed me gently. Her lips brushed against mine as she uttered words that made my heart flutter.

“I’ve always been your girl, Shadow.”

I closed my eyes as she went back to my boxers. I let her pull them off me, my cock springing free.

I held my breath, not opening my eyes for a long beat before I finally couldn’t stand the silence and cracked an eyelid to see her staring at my equipment. I fucking hoped I was able to compete with the watchers in that department. I’d heard rumors about how fucking hung the pricks were. I’d witnessed what Dante was sporting and knew I’d have my work cut out for me.

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