Page 3 of Sofa King Devotion

“Simp!” Mrs. Agnes shouts. “He wants to put his simp in her.”

Everyone in the group nods like she got a Jeopardy question right.

“That’s closer, I guess.” The younger woman shrugs.

“Quinn is teaching us how the kids talk,” Mrs. Betty says proudly.

“Ten toes on it,” Mrs. Nelson adds.

“I knew this was a bad idea.” Quinn shakes her head.

“Quinn is our new recruit.” Mrs. Agnes grins. “Fresh blood.”

“Now, Mrs. Agnes, you promised you’d stop the sacrifices after the last one,” I tease, and she slaps my arm.

“Stop flirting with me. You know I'm a married woman.”

“So,” Mrs. Betty jumps in, “if sweet Julius is putting his simp in Liv, I’m guessing that means you were smashing shoes with Lane Thomas?”

“Knocking boots,” Quinn whispers.

“Same thing.” She waves Quinn off.

“You know a gentleman never kisses and tells, Mrs. Betty.”

“From what I’ve heard, you’re far from a gentleman.” Mrs. Betty looks me up and down, and I put my hand over my bare chest.

“You wound me.”

“You’ll get over it.” Mrs. Betty huffs like she hasn’t got time for this when she was the one who stopped to talk. “Come on, Stitches, the hot drink isn’t going to pour everywhere on its own.”

“Spill the tea,” Quinn says, but she might as well be talking to herself at this point.

“Ladies.” I tip my hat at them in farewell.

“Mind your business,” Mrs. Agnes says and waves goodbye.

“It’s standing on—” Quinn stops and shakes her head. “Never mind.” She hurries to follow after the surprisingly speedy older women while talking to herself. “What have I done?”

Once they’re gone, I pull my T-shirt on and get in the truck. I’ve got things I need to do today. I was hoping Lane would come with me, but I pushed her as far as I could this morning, and I have to be smart about this.

I drive downtown and park next to Sofa King Cozy where Lane works. If she’s going in today, which she probably is, she won’t be in for a little while. She’s always working so damn hard, and although I admire her work ethic, she never gives herself a break. It’s like she’s worried that if she stops, then it means she’s failed.

There’s a hardware store next to her and Liv’s shop, and that’s where I’m headed. The sign above the door reads Rhode Hard. I think it’s great that the town leans into the dirty puns. We’ve got a Rhode Hard hardware store, Sofa King Cozy furniture store, Pump It and Go gas station, Balls for All sports shop, Wet and Ready laundromat, and now a new one called Clean Kitty cat groomer.

The bell over the door chimes, and Rhodes pops up from behind the counter so fast it startles me.

“Jesus, Rhodes, give a guy some warning.”

“That’s what the bell is for.” He looks at me like I’m an idiot. “Why are you here so early?”

“Got an early start” is all I say because I have to stop thinking about waking up next to Lane and seeing her perfect tits. If I do, I’ll need to find a bathroom and rub one out, and I’d rather wait and do that in the comfort of my own home. “Still need help with the stage?”

“Yeah. It’s mostly done, but there’s a side of it I’ll need another set of hands to steady.” He holds up a box of screws. “I came to grab these. You want to go to City Hall now?”

“Sure.”

Rhodes says something to the people working the shop today, and we walk outside. The auction is tomorrow, and there’s only a few things left to do. I’m not exactly looking forward to it since I seem to be the main attraction.

---