Page 73 of A Secret Escape

“I know.” And she felt guilty for all the worry she’d caused her mother. She was going to make sure that from now on she would be a bundle of sunny positivity whenever she visited. “How about you? Never married?”

Their main course was delivered at that moment and he waited until they were alone again to answer.

“I married straight out of law school, and it lasted a year. So I think we can both agree it was something I wasn’t good at. But it was an experience, and all experiences teach you something.”

“I think relationships are just hard. People change, and they want different things.”

He studied her for a moment. “What do you want?”

In that moment he reminded her of Nicole.If you could have three wishes . . .

It was something she rarely thought about because she was so focused on making it through each day, but she thought about it now and realized that she’d been stuck in the present since Richard had left, and that was entirely her fault.

She hadn’t wanted Richard to walk out. She hadn’t wanted him to leave her. She hadn’t wanted any of it to happen, and because of that she’d refused to let herself move on. And by not moving on, by not accepting things as they were, by looking for areas of blame both in herself and him, she’d kept things the same. But they weren’t the same, and all she was really doing was denying the truth. And denying herself a future. She’d spent her whole time looking back, wanting to somehow find the place where she’d dropped the ball so that she could undo everything that had happened, but now she realized that there was no going back. There never had been. There was only what lay ahead, and instead of seeing a bleak future she saw possibilities.

Whatdidshe want?

“I want what I have,” she said finally. “Is that boring? Maybe it is to someone else, but I love Forest Nest and the people who stay with us. I love this part of the world, and it feels like a privilege to be able to live and work here.”

“You love the people who stay with you, with the exception of the moody thriller writer.”

“He’s appalling,” she agreed. “Nightmare guest.”

“You could do away with him.”

“Generally we find that murdering our guests doesn’t have a positive impact on customer reviews, but I suppose we might risk it if it was truly warranted.” She stared at him. “Why are you laughing?”

“Because you’re funny. You’re good company. Here, try this.” He speared a piece of meat and handed it to her. “But brace yourself. Because it’s going to be the best thing you’ve ever tasted.”

“This whole meal is the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” She ate the meat and made an appreciative sound. “You’re right. That’s good.”

“Isn’t it? Have another piece.”

“I’d better not. I don’t want to think about how many calories are in that.”

“Why would you even care? We’re eating out somewhere special. We can worry about calories tomorrow. Or not.”

And it was such a change from Richard, who on more than one occasion had said, “Are you sure you want that slice of toast, Milly?” that she took another bite of his food and offered him some of hers, and in that moment she didn’t feel like someone’s wife or even their ex-wife. She didn’t feel like Zoe’s mother or the boss of Forest Nest. She felt like herself. Milly.

They ate and talked, and talked some more until eventually the people around them melted away, and they were the last people left on the candlelit terrace.

When they finally walked back to his car she had a powerful urge to take his hand, but she resisted, afraid that she might do or say something she’d later regret, but then he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, and she kissed him back, feeling the hard pressure of his body against hers, the flat of his hand on the small of her back urging her closer,and the warmth and skill of his mouth on hers. The kiss came with a promise of something more, something she hadn’t imagined for herself, hadn’t even known she needed. She wanted the moment to last forever, and when she finally eased away from him, dizzy and happy, she discovered that she regretted nothing.

They drove home, and he had one hand on the wheel and the other on her leg.

She covered his hand with hers.

Neither of them said anything until they pulled up outside the boathouse, and then he turned to her, cupped her face in his hands and kissed her again.

“Milly, Milly,” he murmured the words against her mouth, “I don’t want tonight to end.”

“Neither do I.”

His lips traced a path from her mouth to her jaw. “My cabin is just down the track.”

She closed her eyes, transported by his touch. She was tempted, oh so tempted, but another part of her knew she wasn’t ready. She had so much to think about. So much to process. And she was glad that she had Nicole staying because she knew it would help to talk it through. “Tonight was a big step for me. I’ve been with Richard since I was twenty-one.”

He drew back. “So we’ll take it slowly.” He stroked her cheek with his thumb. “How would you feel about a second date?”

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