Page 55 of A Secret Escape

Chapter13Nicole

They ran every day at five o’clock in the morning, and as Milly had predicted they saw no one.

The first time they left the boathouse Nicole wore a wig, dark glasses and a hat pulled down over her eyes, but after she almost broke her neck tripping over an exposed root of a tree, she agreed to remove the glasses.

“I will be watching,” Milly had promised, “and if I see anyone I will warn you, and you can put your glasses on. Although honestly, I think sunglasses make you look more like a movie star. It’s movie-star uniform, isn’t it? Just behave like a normal person.”

“I am a normal person. But everyone forgets that.”

“If anyone should be hiding, it should be me.” Milly tugged her baggy T-shirt down over her hips. “Workout gear isn’t very forgiving.”

“You look great.”

It shocked Nicole that Milly had so little confidence in herself, and then she realized that in an entirely different way she had no confidence in herself either, so she was hardly in a position to judge.

She couldn’t get Justin’s words out of her head.You’d be a terrible mother.

Not because she thought he was right—talking to Milly about it had made her feel better on that score—but because it was a truly awful thing to say to someone, particularly when that someone was a person you’d professed to love.

Milly scooped her hair into a ponytail. “If I really look great, why are you putting me through this torture?”

“Because it’s not enough to look great. You also have to feel great. And by the time I’ve finished with you, you’re going to be feeling like you’ve never felt before.”

“Like I’m going to die, you mean?”

As predicted, Milly had only managed ten minutes of slow jogging on the first and second days. By day five she was managing fifteen minutes and at the end of the first week she hit twenty minutes, although by the time they completed that last run, she was breathing so hard Nicole was worried she’d have to resuscitate her.

Exercise was something she took for granted as being part of her job. Most days she did it without thinking, but she thought about it now as she constructed a doable workout for her friend.

Nicole taught Milly how to warm up and stretch, and halfway round the lake she found the stump of a tree that was exactly the right height to do step-ups.

“This is perfect. Go for it. Twelve reps, minute off, then another twelve reps.”

“You’re inhuman,” Milly had panted as Nicole had made her step onto the tree trunk so many times she eventually collapsed onto it for a rest. “Enough.”

“It’s great for your quads.”

“My quads disagree.”

Being outside like this had been terrifying at first, but she discovered that the more she focused on Milly, the less she thought about herself. The exercise was easy for her. She could have run around the lake eight times without having to pause for air, but even though she knew the training schedule she followed probably wasn’t practical for most people,still she was shocked by how generally unfit her friend was. And she was appalled by how little attention Milly paid to herself. Zoe was her first priority, then her mother and Nanna Peg, the business, Richard, and then, if there was any time left, which there never was, herself. She worried constantly about Zoe and claimed that was part of being a mother, and Nicole in turn worried that she simply wouldn’t be good enough and that her baby deserved better.

Fortunately helping Milly took her mind off her own problems.

The forest was their friend, shielding them from prying eyes and offering no end of opportunities for varying the workout. The joy of being outdoors was indescribable, and she appreciated every moment. The scent of the trees, the crunch of leaves and twigs under her feet, the birdsong, a shaft of sunlight breaking through the branches.

For the first time in as long as she could remember, Nicole felt free. The early-morning runs gave her a tiny, delicious taste of what life would be like if she was anonymous, and she found herself starving for more of it. To be able to leave the house at any time of day. To be able to step outside her front door without cameras being pointed at her. To walk down a street without being stopped. To be able to sleep at night without worrying about who might be trying to break into her house.

And they were back home every day before Zoe was even awake. That quiet hour where they relaxed in the kitchen or took their coffee onto the deck was fast becoming Nicole’s favorite time of day.

She banned croissants and pancakes and instead encouraged Milly to chop fresh fruit and nuts onto plain yogurt. When her friend tried to sneak in a spoonful of honey, Nicole positioned herself by the cupboard like a sentry.

“You don’t need it.”

“I do need it. Local bees. Organic.”

“It’s still sugar. You don’t need it.”

Milly had sighed and eaten the yogurt without the honey, a martyrish expression on her face.