Page 54 of A Secret Escape

“There are never enough hours in the day.” She squirmed, because she wasn’t only lying to Nicole, she was lying to herself. “It’s an excuse, I know. But I hate the gym. All those mirrors and skinny people around you, most of them filming themselves on their phones. I’m terrified my flab might go viral.”

“You don’t need a gym to work out. You’re surrounded by hills and trails. You can run and climb.”

“I think you might be overestimating my basic fitness level,” Milly said. “I don’t run anywhere.”

Nicole put her fork down. “Okay, so it’s time for a review of our current situation. You’re unfit and feeling generally bad about yourself. I’m terrified to leave the house and am also terrified about the future. How are we going to fix this?” She leaned forward. “Strategy time.”

“You have a strategy that can fix all that?” She remembered all the times they’d done this when they were young. Boys. Schoolwork. Scary parties. Becoming a movie star. Whatever the goal was, Nicole would come up with a strategy. “You’ve got that look on your face.”

“Which look?”

“The one that scares me because it usually means you’re going to make me do something I don’t want to do.”

Nicole didn’t deny it. “What are you like at five in the morning?”

Milly burst out laughing. “Comatose. Unless I’m lying there fuming about Richard.”

“Not anymore. Starting tomorrow you’re going to be down here at five wearing your running shoes. You are going to start by running for fifteen minutes. You can walk the rest and gradually increase the time. How does that sound?”

It sounded awful.

“I won’t be doing any of that because there is no way I’m getting up at five. Also, I hate to break this to you, but I can’t run for five minutes.I’d be doubled over and panting for breath after three. And anyway, I don’t want to get thin for Richard.”

“You’re not getting thin for Richard. This isn’t about losing weight. This is about getting fitter and stronger because you want to. I guarantee it will change the way you feel about yourself. You will feel healthier and more energetic, and you will start to love the feel of the early morning.”

“Again, no.” But she knew that once Nicole had an idea about something, it was hard to shift her.

“I’m going to walk into your bedroom tomorrow and haul those covers from you so that you don’t have a choice. It’s tough love.”

Tough love.

An idea came into her head. Nicole wasn’t the only one who could come up with a strategy. “I’ll do it if we do it together.”

Nicole shook her head. “No way. I’ll be staying here at base, making you a delicious cup of coffee for your return. And anyway, someone has to stay with Zoe.”

“No, they don’t. I don’t like leaving her overnight, but she’s fine for twenty minutes in the morning, and we can lock the door.” She saw the panic in Nicole’s eyes and almost relented, but then she thought about the reality of it. “You can’t shut yourself away forever, Nic. You have a life to live. Youdeserveto have a life. You can’t let other people stop that.”

“You don’t get it.”

“That’s probably true. I can’t begin to imagine what it must be like to not be able to walk down a street without being recognized. To be afraid in your own home. But I do know you’re scared, and I know about being scared. I’ve been scared for most of my life. Scared about people leaving. Scared about Zoe growing up with daddy issues. Scared that I might be on my own for the rest of my life.” She gave a short laugh. “Which makes no sense because the last thing I want at this point is a man. Ironic, isn’t it? Most days I feel invisible, and you feel far too visible. What a pair we are. But we’re going to do this.”

“I can’t.” Nicole’s voice was a whisper, and Milly realized that when her friend had called her saying that she needed somewhere to hide,she had meant it literally. She’d worried about how Nicole would be able to keep a low profile, and only now was she seeing that given the choice Nicole wouldn’t set foot outside the boathouse.

And she felt guilty as she remembered how readily she’d dismissed Nicole’s problems as trivial. There was nothing trivial about it. How must it feel to not be able to live life normally? To not be able to drop into a coffee shop when you liked or even arrive at a remote railway station in the middle of the night without wearing a disguise?

She felt grateful for her life. Compared to Nicole’s existence, it was simple and unglamorous, and most of the time it was relentless hard work, but she had a freedom that she took for granted. A freedom she wouldn’t swap for fame and fortune.

“Remember that party we both went to when we were fifteen?” Milly gently coaxed a wasp away from the food. “I was too scared to go, but you said you’d be right there by my side, and you were, and that’s what I’m going to do for you. We are going to leave this house, and I am going to be right by your side.”

Nicole didn’t smile. “You think you can defend me from an overenthusiastic fan or worse?”

“I don’t think we’ll meet anyone, and if we do, I will say a bright, cheerfulGood morningand draw their attention to something on the lake while you power past. You’re pregnant, Nicole. You need to stay healthy, and that includes fresh air and exercise.”

Nicole hesitated. “People want to do me actual harm!”

Sensing a weakening of resolve, Milly lifted her chin.

“They’re going to have to go through me first.”

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