Page 66 of One Touch

Tears splashed down on Miller’s chest. He sat up and scooped me into his arms. “Hey. I’m here.”

His words opened a floodgate, and my tears turned to sobs. He wasn’t telling me to stop or that everything would be okay. He simply told me he was here. It was profound. He made me feel safe.

I’d worked so hard to keep control of everything, to be a perfect Silver. And for what? My life was a controlled waste. It had been void of color until Miller and his chaotic nature crashed into it.

He brought flavor and liveliness into my apartment. He’d taught me it was okay to feel things. That I could laugh. That there was more to life than hockey. There were cuddles on the couch, shopping in Farmer’s markets, and sharing a meal. There were bubble baths, hand-holding, and kisses. It was absurd to think how I’d initially convinced myself I hated him. It was the furthest thing from the truth. In fact…

My tears slowed, and I drew back. Miller handed me a tissue, and I wiped my sodden face. “I’m sor?—”

“Don’t you dare apologize for finally feeling something! You’re allowed to have feelings, Lath.”

I wanted to believe him, but I’d been told something different my whole life. “Objectively, I know that, but it’s hard to rewrite everything I’ve learned in one night.”

“Fair. Just promise me you’ll start letting yourself feel.”

“I’ll try.”

“All right.” He nodded like he was finalizing something inside his mind. “How about a bubble bath, hot chocolate, and then cuddles on the couch? I’m sure Alaska misses me and needs to get in some cuddles, too,” he teased.

“You wish.”

He chuckled, pulled me from the bed, and led me to the bathroom. I was too in awe of him to help. I stared at him as the magnitude of my feelings re-emerged. I wanted to keep my promise, but these emotions felt almost too big to be real. Maybe I just needed to practice in small doses. So, while he filled the tub, I let everything I felt for him surface. It was effervescent, swoony, and overwhelming.

“There. Now, climb in. I want to be the little spoon tonight.”

Smirking, I followed his commands, slid into the tub, and placed my back against the cold porcelain. He slotted himself between my legs and leaned back against me. It was nice, and I wanted more of this. I wasn’t ready for him to leave.

“Are you really moving out?” I blurted.

“That’s always been the plan.” His voice was small, and his movements halted. He wasn’t wrong. His moving in had been temporary. So why did it feel like my heart would break if he left?

“You don’t have to.”

“I can’t mooch off you forever, Lath. I need to have my own space.”

“Just… don’t rush into anything. Promise me you’ll talk to me before you finalize anything.”

“Okay. I promise.”

At his promise, I relaxed into the tub and pulled him closer. I wasn’t ready to let him go. I didn’t know if I ever would, honestly.

We didn’t bring it up the rest of the night, but it sat heavy on my recently vacated shoulders. We watched a movie, but I couldn’t remember what it was about. My mind had turned the whole time thinking of solutions. I wouldn’t lose Miller. I couldn’t.

* * *

We lost our next two home games. I didn’t want to point fingers, but something was off between Miller and me. The skeptical part of me wondered if my vulnerability was the cause. The instant I shared something real with him, we started to lose. It could be a coincidence, but my cynical soul didn’t believe in coincidences.

“Want to run some drills?” I asked.

“I have a better idea.” He smiled, and my heart matched that of a hummingbird’s wings.

We were in Utah for an away game, so I wasn’t sure what he had in mind, but being with Miller was always fun.

However, thirty minutes later, when we pulled into a school, I was no longer sure that held true.

“You brought me to school?”

Miller laughed but didn’t elaborate. The car wound around the campus before stopping at a huge building. I climbed out of the car and shielded my eyes as I took in the view of the mountains and snow.

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