Page 74 of Stay for Me

“Just haunted by the past,” I muttered, draining the last of the whiskey. It wasn’t the truth, but it sure as fuck wasn’t a lie.

“Well, we had another author signing at Rossy’s,” she began, and over the next hour, she told me about her job at Rossy’s Books, and the Portland office. I closed my eyes and listened to every single word, grateful for her friendship. She didn’t have to accept me, but she did. She accepted every aspect of Grayson’s life, including me.

When she was done, she asked, “Where are you right now, Mags?”

“Workshop.”

She was quiet for a few seconds. “Do you need me to come down there? I can make you my strawberry pancakes.”

“Probably would go into a diabetic coma from all that sugar, darlin’,” I drawled.

“Sugar is good for the soul, Mags. It brings light to it,” Carrie defended.

I said nothing, opening my eyes to stare at the desk again.

Light.

A little light was all I needed, something to guide me home in the dark, to pull me up when I was under.

Diana’s laugh rang in my ears then, and suddenly, I wasn’t sitting alone in the workshop. I was standing in the middle of Denver’s living room, watching Diana’s head fall back, a sweet melody of laughter coming from her as Mason and Lawson bickered back and forth. When she was done, the laughter transitioned into a soft giggle, and she wiped a happy tear from under her eye as she looked over to me.

The smile on her face stretched, beaming at me and only me.

“Mags,” Grayson clipped in my ear.

I blinked, shaking my head.

The desk reappeared in the corner, and I was back in reality.

“Here,” I answered, setting the bottle back down before rubbing my hand over my face.

“Christ, Carrie’s been calling your name for five minutes, man.”

“Must’ve dosed,” I rumbled, rising from my seat and taking one more look at the bottle.

That was it—I’d reached my limit.

One bottle to forget her.

One bottle to shove everything back down.

From now on, I wasn’t allowed to drink with the thought of her in mind. Social drinks only until the pain dulled and the gaping hole in my heart scarred back over. Leaving the bottle where it was, I walked out of the shop, locked up, and turned to looked up at the full moon.

“What’s going on, Mags? For fuck’s sake, talk to me,” Grayson ordered.

“Just dealing with another demon, Gray. That’s all.”

“What do you need from me?”

“All I need is time,” I murmured before hanging up.

Time.

That was all I needed.

Unfortunately, I didn’t know just how much I would need to get over my firefly, but as always, I pressed on.

Thankfully, I didn’t dream of her when I finally made it to bed. No, the horrors of war filled my mind, and when I woke the next morning, I could still hear the bombs, smell the scent of burning flesh, and taste the blood in my mouth.

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