Page 59 of Choosing You

Midway through the movie I get sleepy. An hour later I wake up lying against Garret, his arm around me. He’s asleep and the TV is now a blue screen.

“Garret, get up.” I push myself off him and get up to take the movie out.

“The movie’s already over?” He yawns. “How did that happen?”

“We fell asleep. You want to watch another one or do you want to go to bed?”

“It’s only 10:30. It’s too early for bed. Let’s see what’s on TV.”

I grab the TV remote and return to the chair. I flip to an old movie from the eighties.

“My mom loved this one,” Garret says. “It’s about these two girls who—”

“You never mention your mom. Does she live around here?”

He gives me an odd expression. “My mom is dead. I thought you knew that. Don’t you watch the news?”

I’m slightly offended by the comment, but I don’t think he meant it to sound condescending. I turn the volume on the TV down.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” I feel my cheeks getting warm.

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago. I was 10 when it happened.”

“Why was it on the news?” I almost don’t want to know. If it made the news, something really bad must’ve happened. The news only reports violent deaths like murders.

“She died in a plane crash. It was one of those small private planes.”

That was my other guess. Some type of tragic accident. But I’m not sure why he thinks I would’ve heard about it on the news in Iowa.

“Did it happen close to here?” I put my hand on his arm. “I’m sorry, Garret. I shouldn’t ask. I’m sure you don’t want to talk about it.”

“No, it’s fine. I can talk about it. It, um, it happened in Virginia. My parents were down in DC for a political fundraiser. My dad had to fly back early for a meeting. Mom stayed behind to attend another event that night. She hated that political crap, but she was kind of expected to go because my dad was a big supporter of this guy’s re-election campaign. Anyway, to say thanks, the guy offered to fly my mom home on his private jet. He had to do a speech in Hartford so the plane was supposed to arrive there and Dad and I were going to drive up and get her.”

Garret pauses for a moment. I can tell that despite what he said, this isn’t easy for him to talk about. “My mom didn’t like private planes. She said they weren’t safe. That’s why we didn’t have one back then. Anyway, soon after the plane took off it crashed. No survivors. It only made national news because that guy was a senator. And to this day, there’s all these rumors on the Internet about how it wasn’t an accident and how someone was trying to kill the senator. Crazy conspiracy shit. Just last year there was an hour long story about it on one of those news programs. It’s like it never goes away.”

I sit there not sure what to say. I had no idea Garret had this giant loss in his life. I get the feeling he hasn’t shared this with many people. It almost seems like the topic hasn’t come up in years. Maybe he tries to forget it. And then I go and open my big mouth asking him all about it.

I feel like I should say or do something, but I don’t know how to respond. It proves once again that I suck at comforting people. Garret is sitting there quietly, likely reliving the event in his head thanks to me. His normally happy face is now sad. Even his eyes look sad. I feel terrible seeing him like this.

“Stand up,” I say to him.

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

He stands up.

I stand right in front of him. “Let’s do that thing you taught me.”

“What thing?”

“That thing with your arms.”

He looks at me, confused.

“You know that day when you found me in your room after I accidentally spent the night here? That thing you did after the pool?”

He starts to smile. “You mean a hug?”

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