Page 164 of Choosing You

I don’t respond. He’s never really said much about his life before I met him. He told me the story about his mom, but the time after that he never talks about. I keep quiet as he continues.

“I used to have this great life. You saw where I used to live. It was normal. I know I said I never had real friends, but I actually did have a few back then. And I had my mom. Everything was perfect. And then something really bad happened. But eventually I moved on. Things got better. My dad and I were getting along really well. And then he met Katherine and everything sucked again. It’s life. Bad shit happens all the time. You can’t run from it. If something bad’s gonna happen, it’s just gonna happen.”

“I can’t deal with it, Garret. I can’t deal with any more bad things happening in my life. I can’t keep getting closer to you and then have you leave.”

He lies on his back, staring at the ceiling. “Then you’re weak, Jade. And you’re a coward.”

I sit up. “I am not weak! Or a coward! I’m just protecting myself.”

“From what? Life? So then I guess I’ll just go back to getting drunk every night so I can protect myself from feeling shitty about my family. And my dead mother. And you dumping me. Great, thanks for the advice. Maybe I’ll go down to my dad’s liquor cabinet and have a drink right now.” He turns away from me on his side.

Maybe he’s right. Maybe Iama coward. Maybe I’m afraid of life and all the crappy things that come with it. Maybe I’m afraid to be happy. But why? How did I get this way? I don’t want to be this way. I really don’t. I want to be happy.

“Garret?” I nudge his back.

He sighs. “What? You want me to leave?”

I tug on his shoulder. “No. I don’t want you to leave.” He turns on his back again, figuring out I’m not talking about leaving the room. “Even though I know there’s a chance this won’t last, I want this. I want this for as long as I can have it.”

“You can have it forever, Jade. I told you. I’m not going anywhere.”

Part of me still doesn’t believe him. But the part that does wins out. Because I want to be happy. It’s not a feeling I’m used to, but the more I feel it with Garret, the more I want it, even if it means risking the chance that something bad is waiting just around the corner.

“I love you, Garret.” I sneak under his arm and snuggle up next to him.

He kisses the top of my head. “I love you, too.”

And then it hits me. If the bad stuff didn’t exist, the good stuff wouldn’t seem so incredibly good.

CHAPTERFORTY-FOUR

We wakeup at 10 the next morning and go downstairs for breakfast. Charles isn’t there but he left out a tray of his homemade donuts along with a bowl of fresh fruit and a note to come get him if we want eggs or anything else that needs to be cooked.

Later we go to the theater room and watch a movie. Garret insists on making me another one of his famous turkey sandwiches for lunch and, of course, I accept his offer. They really are good. After that, we end up watching two more movies, but I fall asleep during the second one.

When I wake up, Garret is shutting the equipment off. He looks so damn hot. I can’t take my eyes off his ass in those jeans.

“You missed the whole movie, Jade. So what do you want to do now?” He turns toward me and my gaze moves upward to his fitted white t-shirt that shows off his broad shoulders and muscular arms. “You want to go swimming? Play basketball? I feel like we need to do something active since we’ve been sitting around all day.”

I stand up and stretch, then go over and kiss him. “I can think of something we could do that’s active.”

He smiles. “Right now? In the afternoon?”

“Why not? Can it only be done at night?”

“It can be done any time you want.” He drops the movie he’s holding and grabs my hand, pulling me out of the room and down the hall to the stairs.

“Garret, wait,” His urgency is making me laugh so hard I can’t keep up. “Go ahead. I’ll meet you there.”

“No way. You might change your mind. Why are you being so slow? You’re a runner. I’ll race you to my room.”

He takes off, sending my competitive side on fire. I sprint up the stairs, then pass him in the hallway to his room and collapse on the bed. He’s right behind, landing on top of me.

“You beat me again,” he says out of breath.

“That was just a trick to get me up here faster.”

“Yeah, I’m clever that way.” The cocky smile appears as our eyes meet. I swear he turns me on just by looking at me. He yanks his t-shirt off and I sit up a little to let him take off mine.