Page 65 of Not In Love

The golden fairy lights strung across the ceiling turned the whole space into a glowing, living thing, draped with deep magenta and peacock-blue fabrics that billowed at the corners like banners in a warm, invisible breeze.

The scent of marigolds and spice floated heavy on the air, layered over the buttery richness of samosas and frying sweets coming from the food tables along the far wall.

A smile curved Kash’s mouth, the silk of her pink jacket whispering against her bare skin.

It was beautiful.

Exactly what Muriel and Kaif deserved—a celebration full of color and music and people who loved them. She added another reason to thank Diego, to the already long list.

Her friends flanked her, laughing and adjusting their outfits. Chaaru flashing a glittery bangle, Mona snagging a mocktail from a passing waiter with a grin. Tia, in a twirling rose-pink lehenga, darted ahead toward a cluster of cousins squealing near the dessert table.

Kash stayed back a half step, letting the scene wash over her. She tipped her head back slightly, breathing it in, the way the lights blurred into soft halos, the clink of glass and music vibrating up through her heels.

For the first time in a long, long time, she felt… whole and light. Free of the unknown weight she’d dragged along for so long.

Before she knew it, her gaze was sweeping the hall, searching, seeking.

For him.

The crowd surged and dipped around her in a river of bright colors, flashes of jewelry, men in slim-fitted kurtas and women in embroidered silks. For a heartbeat, she didn’t see him, and her pulse kicked up irrationally.

She turned slightly to say something to Mona and caught him across the room. And froze.

Diego stood near the colorful drinks station, dark-haired and devastating in a navy-blue kurta that clung to the breadth of his shoulders, dark hair slicked back to reveal the rugged planes of his face. He wasn’t alone though.

Two unfamiliar women flanked him, laughing, leaning in, their earrings flashing under the fairy lights. Diego smiled at something one of them said, that easy charm of his on full display.

For a few moments, the ground under Kash’s heels seemed to tip sideways. A stupid, hot knot tightened low in her stomach, stealing her breath.

She tried to tell herself it was nothing. He was being friendly and charming which came to him naturally. But the old insecurities rushed at her fast and hard.

Maybe you waited too long. Maybe he wants someone who can talk about her feelings. Maybe he’s bored already and wants to move on...

Her hand tightened around the slim glass stem of the drink someone placed in her hand.

Mona bumped her hip gently against Kash’s, her voice lowered to a whisper. She had clearly noticed what had arrested Kash’s attention. "Want us to go tackle him off the dance floor for you?"

Kash made herself breathe. Made herself smile, even if it felt like dragging a net up from the bottom of her chest. "No," she said in a thankfully steady voice. Her fingers loosened around her glass.

She let herself look again, really look.

Diego was charming, yes, his grin was quick, his manner easy, even flirtatious. When they moved, he danced with a fluidity that spoke of how confident he was in his body. But the flirting and the laughter and the celebrity persona he put on was only a part of him. The surface part of him.

Hadn’t she been fooled by it for a long while too, thinking nothing substantial existed beneath the charm? It was what he showed the world. Especially the one that already assumed that he’d had his moment in the spotlight and was now going to coast through the rest of his life cashing it in.

The icy solitude of her fears cracked at the thought, and she made herself look again, instead of reacting from a place of insecurities.

His shoulders were a little too stiff, his laughter a little too quick. And while he pretended to be focused on the sparkling conversation with his partners, his attention was far away.

Kash exhaled, a slow, deep breath that settled into her bones.

She knew what it was like when his entire focus was on her—it was as if she was the only star in the universe. She knew, she reminded herself.

“Kash?” Char prompted her with a hand on her wrist. “You okay?”

Kash turned and let her friends see that she was indeed alright. “It’s on, ladies. He wants public display, he’ll get one.”

Mona clinked their glasses together with a loud cheer.

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