Page 51 of Always Mine

Lacey took the seatTabitha vacated.She had already taken care of the room, giving it a good clean, and plumping up the bed.Sitting back, she finally forced herself to look at her daughter.She took a deep breath and promised herself she wouldn’t cry.One look at Daisy, and those tears were not staying in.

“Sweetheart,” Lacey said.“I thought this would get easier.I fucking hate hospitals, and I didn’t want to have to deal with you being in one.”She gritted her teeth.“I am trying to be strong here, because I know deep down, this is what you need.You need love and you need strength.”

She took hold of her daughter’s hand.

“You have always been a special girl.You mean the world to me, Daisy.I know I didn’t give birth to you, and I’m not your real mother, but being your mother has been a real blessing.”Lacey held onto Daisy’s hand.“You made me a better person.”She swiped at the tears, not wanting them to fall on her.“Do you remember that first Christmas we shared?You me, Sally, and Whizz.How we went and got the Christmas tree and all the works.”Lacey laughed.“You were so young and so excited.Your parents had never put up any decorations.You never got a visit from Santa.”

Lacey stopped to take a breath.“You told me and Whizz that Santa only visited really good girls, and that you were a bad girl.Your parents had told you that.Nothing you did was ever good enough and you were this bad, horrible child.”She pressed her lips together.This memory of Daisy was so hard.“You asked me what you had to do to be good, and I had you for several months at this point and you were an angel.You were so good.So brave, and so ...good.”She stopped.“It broke my heart to know those bastards had tried to darken your mind.Tried to make you believe something that wasn’t true.”

Whizz had to hold her back because she had grabbed his gun and had every intention of fucking killing them.

“Whizz told me their time would come, but I wanted to end them, there and then.I didn’t want to wait.I was so angry at him.He told me to turn, to look at you, and all I needed to think about was how much I loved you.”Lacey sniffled.“And I do love you, Daisy.I love you so damn much.I know you didn’t come from my body, but you have no idea how much I wished you did.”Lacey kissed her hand.

Lacey couldn’t stand this.It would have been a lot easier if she herself were in the hospital bed as she would have been able to figure out what to do.It was crazy.

“Why didn’t you tell me what was going on?”Lacey asked.“I could have helped.Whizz could have helped.”She shook her head.“We’d have done anything for you.We still will.We just need you to wake up, baby.”

Lacey took a deep breath and hoped that like in the movies, Daisy would listen to the sound of her voice, the desperation, and simply respond to it and come back to all of them.

Nothing.No change.

Just the horrible mechanical sounds of the beeping machines.

“That’s all right.I’ll just keep thinking about that first Christmas.How your eyes would light up, especially when we got the Christmas tree and decorated the whole house.You looked like you had gotten lost in a fairy tale.There were a few times I would hear you sneaking around at night.I wondered what you were up to, and I’d find you in the sitting room, legs crossed, just staring up at that tree.You loved it that much.I know you didn’t have great parents, Daisy, but Whizz and I did try.”

She sighed, then laughed.“That Christmas morning, do you remember how you avoided going into the sitting room?You wanted to eat breakfast and not go near the sitting room.Whizz and I didn’t get it, and then Sally told us what your problem was.You were terrified to go in there and see no presents from Santa, just in case he decided you were naughty.Sally also told us you were afraid we would no longer want you.”

Lacey felt those tears spring to her eyes.“We wanted you, Daisy.Always.You were so precious.”She couldn’t help but add another laugh.“I saw the anger in Whizz’s eyes.That made him so angry, and he went into the sitting room and came out with two presents.One for Sally and one for you.You looked so shocked.You couldn’t believe it, and for the longest time you held that present in your arms without tearing it open.”Lacey stroked her thumb across Daisy’s hand.“And then, when you did open it, inside was a teddy bear, the same one that even now you keep.You never forgot that teddy bear.You held that bear in your arms, and I just knew you were going to love it forever and ever.Whizz told you there were a lot more presents in the sitting room.You didn’t believe him, but then he’d start to come to the kitchen and lure you away from there, as he showed you different boxes, different wrapping paper, the works, until eventually we got you in that sitting room.You loved opening presents, and I remember after every single one was opened, you turned to me and said, ‘I have been a good girl.’”

And she couldn’t stop the tears from falling.“I vowed that day, Daisy, that no matter what, I would do everything in my power to keep you safe, and seeing you like this, in this hospital bed, I have failed, and I am so sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Whizz said, making her spin around in her chair.

“How long have you been there?”

“Long enough to get taken down a single memory.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why?It’s a good memory.Sad, but good.”Whizz moved toward her, placed his hands on her shoulders, and massaged them gently.It felt so good to have his hands on her.

“That feels good.”

He leaned down and kissed her cheek.“She’s going to be okay, baby.You know this.Daisy is a strong cookie.She just needs this rest right now, and you know she needs it, especially being married to Anthony.I doubt that is an easy thing to do.”

Lacey laughed and wiped her eyes.

“I feel so helpless with her.”

“It will be okay.”He wrapped his arms around her.“That I can promise you.”And he kissed her cheek again.

Lacey sunk against him, but she didn’t let go of Daisy’s hand.That was something she was going to struggle to do again.

She had vowed to take care of her daughter and she was not going to stop.She would never stop.

Daisy, please come back to us.

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