Page 86 of Zero Pucks

“We will make a plan, and you won’t ever have to be afraid again.” I held his chin and kissed him before forcing myself to let go and swing my legs back down to the floor.

I felt off-center and entirely unlike myself, but it wasn’t a bad thing. Myself hadn’t been the greatest guy for a long while. Before that night in Vegas, I’d been so angry. I was tired all the time and maybe not the best friend to the people who cared most about me.

I was ready to assume the worst of every single situation I was in. Amedeo—with a single, well-timed blackout drunk night—had flipped my world upside down. His presence alone had allowed me to feel a kind of hope I’d only ever read about in books.

How could I do anything other than give the rest of my life to protect him and make him happy?

“Will you head back to your rental?” I asked, fishing my rink badge out of my nightstand and slinging the lanyard around my neck. I turned to look at him as my fingers curled around my white cane and shoved it into my back pocket.

“I…don’t know. I think so. I need to get some work done and also figure out…stuff.” He hesitated on that last word, and I could only imagine what that meant. His job, for one. His apartment. His things. His family. His friends.

I couldn’t imagine doing what he was offering to do. It would ruin me if I were facing the prospect of leaving here. I bent over for a last kiss, then pulled away and turned, pausing in the doorway.

“Do you need a break from me?”

From this far off, he was nothing more than a blurry blob, but I watched as that fleshy-colored mass sat up halfway. “Doyou?”

I smiled. I wasn’t going to play this game. I wasn’t going to let my insecurity get the best of me. “No.”

He lay back with a heavy thud. “Good. Neither do I. Can I pick you up tonight?”

“We have practice until nine. I usually eat at the sandwich shop across from the rink after I’m done with the kids. Meet me there at seven so we can make out in a booth like teenagers?”

He laughed. “I’ll be there. Text me. I’ll…” He went quiet for a beat, but I let myself be patient as he worked out whatever it was he wanted to say. “I’ll miss you.”

My heart did a quick double beat as I leaned my temple against the doorframe and smiled at him. “I’ll miss you too. See you soon, baby.”

And then, before I could overthink or feel even the tiniest urge to self-sabotage this perfect moment, I turned on my heel and hurried out the door as fast as my semi-mechanical legs would carry me.

CHAPTERTWENTY

TUCKER

My eye was watering,staring at the enlarged text on the computer screen. It would have been easier to fire up Jonah’s JAWS program and have it read out to me, but I couldn’t be assed to turn it on and deal with the navigation.

Besides, the contract wasn’t anything I hadn’t seen before. It was just…more official. And more money. Quite a bit more money. Not fuck you money. Not NHL money. But there was a sign-on bonus that would be enough to help get Boden a better car since he was the one who did most of the driving.

It would be enough to put toward the down payment of the bigger house he and I had always talked about buying, though now that this thing with Amedeo was happening, I was feeling a little unsure about that.

It was my one single hesitation. What would being serious with him look like? What would actually change?

There would be things I’d rely on him for instead of Boden, and while I didn’t mind, I was terrified to let my best friend think he was becoming irrelevant. Only…maybe Boden wanted that. Maybe he was tired of me being a burden?

There was a knock on the door, and I looked up to see Jonah hovering.

“Come in. I’m alone.”

He made his way across the room, one hand out and low to make sure he didn’t knock into anything. He slid into his usual chair and leaned back, folding his arms over his chest. “You’re quiet.”

“Reading,” I said.

“Mm. Smut?”

“Yeah. Real dirty shit. Lizard dick porn.”

Jonah grinned. “Speaking of, you would not believe the video Micah got a hold of last week. Goblins.”

“Christ’s sake. I will never shock you, will I?”