Page 38 of Zero Pucks

“I don’t remember.”

There was a long beat, and then I dropped my hands from his cheeks to his shoulders. I should have pulled away. All social propriety and decorum told me that was what I was supposed to do. But I didn’t want to let go. It had been so long since anyone had wanted me to touch them, and Tucker was leaning into my touch.

“Sucks that we might have had that and neither of us can remember it,” he murmured.

I nodded, then finally let him go. For a second, I swore there was disappointment in his face, but it was gone before I could take a second look. “So. Hockey.”

“Right,” he said, clapping his hands. “You’re going to love it. The guys are amazing. The new coach fucking sucks, but he’ll probably be gone soon. And if someone pisses you off, you basically have carte blanche to slam them into the boards. If you stick around long enough, maybe I can get you into a sled.”

Like fuck that would happen, but I still let myself nod and smile. It was nice to pretend, even if all of this was nothing more than a fantasy I wouldn’t get to keep.

* * *

In spite of taking all the vacation days I had in the bank—which were plenty, considering I never took time off work—I still got calls. The system we worked with was total shit, and the programs were always throwing error codes.

And the fact that we were right in the middle of corporate tax season, it was never-ending. It was why I had to blow Tucker off for breakfast the next morning and pray that he didn’t take it personally.

We’d parted ways on better terms than I thought we would. He’d walked me to my Uber and held my hand for a really long time. For a moment, I thought he might go in to take that kiss we’d both lost to alcohol in Vegas, but he just held my gaze before letting me go.

I went to sleep with a good-night text flashing behind my eyelids and woke up with a good morning waiting for me on my screen.

When I let him know I couldn’t meet him, he’d sent me a teardrop emoji but then told me to let him know when I was free. And that was that. With the workload mounting, that was going to be never if I didn’t start sticking up for myself and the time off I’d earned.

Fuck, I needed a new job, along with a new boyfriend.

Glancing at the clock, I realized it was nearly noon, and all I’d had was a stale croissant and some shitty coffee from a pod that tasted like ass. I felt kind of crusty from stress sweat, so I decided to hop in the shower and rinse off.

There was a little café not too far from where I was staying, and a walk in the sun was just what my pasty skin needed. I’d been indoors for too damn long. God, when had I lost myself so badly? A trip to a small East Coast town should not feel like another universe.

I needed to do better. As my old therapist would have me saying over and over, I deserved better.

My shoes were a little tight as I began the walk down the street, but the fresh air felt good in my lungs, and the heavy weight on my shoulders began to ease. When my phone started buzzing with an unknown number, I didn’t even feel panic.

If it was work, I was going to tell them to fuck all the way off. I was taking some time for me.

“Yes?”

“Baby.” It wasn’t work.

I stopped dead in my tracks. My knees went a little weak, and by some miracle, there was a bus bench a few feet away to catch me before I fell. God, why did hearing Bryce’s voice fuck me up so badly? My breath shook on my exhale.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Why are you being like this?” His voice took on an old, familiar whine.

Unable to help it, I let out a laugh. “Is that a joke? You cheated on me r-repeatedly. You mistreated me. You d-d-d—” I took a breath to slow my words. “You don’t bother treating our relationship like it matters to you. The entire w-week before I went to Vegas, you shit all over me.”

“Baby—”

“Don’t!”

He was completely silent.

“Now you’re refusing to leave my apartment like you have any r-right to be there,” I finished. “Whose phone are you calling me on, anyway? Because I blocked your number.” I was shaking like an autumn leaf, but it was worth it to unleash on him. There was still so much pent up—so much I wanted to say, even if nothing would ever really get through.

“Don’t worry about it. I just wanted to know why you’re in fucking Massachusetts, of all places.”

My blood ran cold. “What? How do you know that?”

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