Page 37 of Ashes of Saints

A lady holds out a basket of roses and I take the top one with a ribbon tied around it. Then step to the edge as they lower Mom’s coffin down into her grave.

Tears start to slide down my cheeks and I shake as if I’ve only suddenly realized Mom is gone. Goddamn. Of course, I wait until all eyes are on me to break down.

I can’t do this.

I can’t do this.

A panic attack begins to take hold of me, anger and fear bubbling up inside. I’m milliseconds from my legs collapsing under me when a large body envelops me.

Parker wraps his powerful arm around me, his hand resting on my hip.

“Take a breath,” he whispers into my hair.

I do as he says noisily and hear Chloe clear her throat behind us.

Parker presses his body against mine as I shake and glance around at the others present. Then he reaches down, takes hold of the hand holding the rose, and says, “Say goodbye, Aurora. You have a lifetime to unravel everything else.”

I lift my gaze and for a moment those blue eyes of his, so familiar and yet so dark and dangerous, tell me he’s no stranger to pain.

Gone was the cheeky grin and flirty billionaire I’d been on a date with on the weekend. This was a man giving me his support and what felt like protection.

I feel safe, and it hits me that I’ve never felt like this before.

No one will hurt me while he is near me.

No one.

There is no doubt in my mind.

I don’t care that he didn’t kiss me—fine, yes, I do—because right now, his presence is powerful and unyielding.

I glance once again at Mom’s coffin, seeking a bunch of words that are both expected of me and appropriate.

I don’t find any.

How can I when she might not even be the woman I knew?

“Rest in peace, Mom.” I sniff, wipe my cheek with the arm of my jacket, then add, “If that’s who you are.”

Parker’s arm stiffens.

I toss the rose on top of her coffin and turn into his chest, and he wraps his arms around me before I can second guess what I’m doing. His palm runs over my hair affectionately.

I hope he doesn’t ask what I meant. Parker won’t be interested in a woman who comes from unknown stock. I bet he’s a well-bred New Yorker.

Bringing home someone with no idea who her mother is would be unacceptable.

I feel like a leper.

There are already so many gaps in my life and now it is just one big gaping hole.

PARKER

WHAT DID AURORA say?

If that’s who you are.

What in the motherfucking hell does that mean?

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