Page 59 of Rebel in the Deep

I pass it back. “You know, we’re more than happy to drop you at any island on our way south. Any of them would be safer than staying on this ship.”

“Undoubtedly.” Dia shrugs and exhales a smaller circle into the larger one she just created. Her control is truly inspirational. “But this fight started a very long time ago, even before Siobhan’s time. Ezra thought he could change the system from within. He didn’t talk much with Bowen about the flaws he saw, which, in hindsight, I realize was a mistake. The boy conducted himself with honor, but he didn’t question his orders until Evelyn came along.”

Calling Bowen, easily as massive as Frost if not more so, a boy seems a stretch, but who am I to tell an elder how to view someone she raised? “It’s impossible to change the system from within. We have to break it.”

“I understand that now.” She nods slowly. “I’ll be little enough help on Lyari itself, but I can assist in ensuring you don’t run into weather trouble on the way.”

Her divination being specific to weather patterns is invaluable on a ship. “Thank you.” I urge a little more air into our sails. We’re moving along at a quick clip, but I can’t help looking over my shoulder, expecting to see Morrigan lurking on the horizon.

In the hours I was…occupied…with Siobhan and Bastian, we left Three Sisters far behind. We should be seeing Broax shortly, a strange island where gravity doesn’t exist. With the proper precautions, it’s possible to explore the space, but the moment your oxygen runs out, you’re dead. The island hosts no breathable air on its own.

There are a lot of deadly islands along our planned route. There’s a reason the trade route from north to south in Threshold takes a certain path; it follows islands welcoming to humanoid folks, which means villages and towns with ports and supplies. Even with the resupply, we’ll be running lean by the time we reach Yoth, but we’ll make it without anyone going hungry.

Dia and I smoke in silence for a while before she puts out her blunt and tucks the remainder in her pocket. She pats me on the shoulder. “You’ll do fine, Nox. You’re a good captain and a good person.”

There’s no reason for her words to make my chest hurt. I blame the drugs. I smile. “Thanks, Dia. You’re welcome on theAudacityas long as you’d like to be here.”

Chapter29

Siobhan

I wake up in waves. Thewarmth of Nox’s bed. The press of Bastian behind me, one arm thrown over my waist. The scent of sex. My body is loose and lethargic, my eyes heavier than they’ve ever been. I shift, and Bastian’s arm tenses.

“You’re awake,” I murmur.

“I am.” He sighs. “I don’t want to be. It feels like last night was a dream that I never want to end.”

A dream is a good way to put it. There was the furious and fearful trip from Kanghri, sure every moment that we’d be cut down by my sister. Then coming into this cabin and things changing forever…At least Iwantthem to have changed forever.

But I’m not the only person in this equation, and my singular desires don’t outweigh the needs and desires of Bastian and Nox. Nox, whose absence feels very pointed. There’s no reason for that feeling. They’re the captain. They can’t laze about intheir cabin for days on end, no matter how profound last night felt. At least for me.

I sit up slowly and push my hair back from my face. “Nox is going to run again.”

Bastian stretches, his muscles flexing beneath his skin and the sheet sliding low on his hips. “Nox was always going to run. They’re afraid to want too desperately.”

I start to argue, but stop. I may have known Nox a long time, but BastianknewNox. “Life is too short not to want things desperately.”

“I agree.” He sits up and presses a light kiss to my lips. “Give them time. They wouldn’t have let last night happen if they didn’t want this. We just need to stay very still and lull them into a sense of security. Like a wolf and a bunny.” His dark eyes twinkle. “Or, more accurately, a hound.”

I snort. “Nox is no bunny.”

“Of course not,” Bastian says gently. “They’re a human who can make their own decisions. Just give them time.”

Normally, I’m the one who is reasonable and thoughtful, and Bastian leads with his heart. It’s uncomfortable for that situation to be reversed…but also comforting at the same time. At leastsomeoneis thinking clearly. “I can give them time.” What we have of it. Either we die in this mission, or we change the face of Threshold forever.

I’m not foolish enough to think the work stops there, even if we’re successful. Nature abhors a power vacuum, and the cesspool in Lyari even more so. We have to hamstring the Cwn Annwnandoffer a better way forward.

I hate that the way forward likely means me as leader, or at least part of a new Council, one that is meant to represent all ofThreshold, not just the nobles in Lyari. We should have a representative from each island, voted in from their own people. It’s sure to be messy and complicated, but it’s still preferable to what we have now.

Bastian gives me one last kiss and slips out of bed. “I’m going to shower and then see what tasks Poet has for us to complete today.”

I wait for him to disappear into the bathroom before I stand and stretch, my hands easily reaching the ceiling. I came in here without a single piece of clothing, but I catch sight of the bag I brought from the safe house on the dresser. I hadn’t noticed either Bastian or Nox bringing it in here, but Nox obviously used their magic to clean the salt water from the fabric and my boots, because the neatly folded clothes smell faintly of Nox and nothing else.

Putting them on feels like a declaration of something, but it’s no more than I already decided on previously. I want Bastian. I want Nox, too. No matter what that looks like.

I dress quickly and head outside, mostly to give my restless energy a place to go. I only make it three steps before I have to pull up short to avoid trampling Dia.

She peers up at me. “We need to speak. Privately.”

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