Page 96 of Songs of Summer

“What?”

He took a beat.

“Nothing. It can wait till morning.”

Track 48

Growin’ Up

Maggie

Maggie looked atthe clock at the Inn in the way one does when calculating how many (or few) hours of sleep are possible if one were to fall asleep that very second. It was the fourth time she had done so. Maggie couldn’t sleep.

“What’s wrong?” Jason asked, similarly restless.

“Nothing. Just processing the weekend.”

“You sure that’s it, Maggie?”

She tried to speak, to say, “Yes, I’m sure,” but she felt physically ill. All she could manage was a grunt.

Jason leaned over and switched on the lamp.

“Look, Mags, I was going to wait till we got home to tell you this, but I think maybe now is better. You know I would do anything to make you happy, right?”

Her lips pressed firmly together, she nodded again.

“Well, after watching you the past few days—I’m having doubts.”

“What kind of doubts?”

“Doubts that I can make you happy.”

“That’s ridiculous. You make me happy.”

He listened and she rolled over and closed her eyes, before rolling back to face him.

“Do I make you happy?” she asked.

“Yes.”

It was the weakestyesshe’d ever heard.

“What is it, Jason?”

“I just think maybe we want different things.”

“Like what?”

“Do you mind if I turn the light out?” he asked sheepishly. She didn’t blame him. This conversation was hard to face head-on.

She smiled at him. “You’re the one who turned it on.”

He switched it off.

“Well, for starters, you want to spend your life above your record shop, rarely leaving the town we grew up in. And I get that you’re deeply connected to it, and that you long to be surrounded by memories of your mom and dad, but—”

“Stop. You’re only saying all of this because you saw something between Matt and me—I have been lying here thinking about it too, and I know it was just the excitement of the weekend that you saw. You’re my person. You always have been.” Even in the dark, she looked deep into his eyes.

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