Page 153 of Hello Stranger

I summoned all the dignity I could access, took my seat, turned to Witt’s grandmother on my opposite side, and then made the best, most scintillating, mostrelentlessoctogenarian-themed chitchat of my entire life.

IT TURNS OUT,I am really good at ignoring people.

Who knew? Another unmarketable skill.

I ignored Joe through the salad course with gusto. And then throughthe main course with determination. And then all through dessert with a miserable kind of glee. If I had to pass him a bread basket, I didn’t even rotate my torso. If he dared to ask me for the sugar, I edged it toward him with the side of my hand and then leaned back in toward Grandma Kellner and demanded, “Tell me all about your garden.”

“Everything?”

“Everything.”

I hope Grandma Kellner enjoyed the attention.

I treated her like a movie star on Oscar night.

Was I dying inside?

One hundred percent.

Seeing Joe was like being struck by emotional lightning.

But can we also appreciate how I wasracking upthe triumphs? I wasn’t weeping. Or hyperventilating. Or vomiting.

I was handling myself. Poised. Gracious. And ignoring my hemorrhaging heart like a legend.

All I had to do was make it to the end of dinner—when, with any luck, Joe would suddenly realize that even though he’d been invited, he wasn’t really welcome.

With any luck, he’d be just as eager to leave as I was to see him go.

Then I could relax.

Then I could dance the night away with Daniel and his adorable friends.

Then I could let this whole weird chapter of my life go at last—and move the hell on.

Thirty-One

BUT JOE DIDN’Tleave. He stayed.

He lurked around the party long after dinner and well into the dancing—watching me with such purpose as I boogied defiantly with Sue and Daniel and all their cousins that he felt like a predator stalking his prey.

I didn’t care that he was here.

I didn’t care that he was here, damn it.

He couldn’t juststare me downinto giving up all my joy.

I had moved on. And bounced back. And if he didn’t understand what he’d lost, then I was better off on my own.

I was fine, I was fine, I was fine.

But you can dance your ass off with bold, hysterical, can’t-touch-this energy for only so long.

Eventually, you have to take a breather.

As soon as I stepped off the dance floor, Joe moved in for the kill.

I didn’t want to talk to him. That should have been perfectly clear. What other message could ignoring him all night possibly convey? Andyet there he was, as soon as I’d separated from the herd, moving toward me—with purpose.

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