Page 116 of Hello Stranger

“But I was joking.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“I wasn’t talking to you.”

Now all the pieces were clicking into place. “That’s why you posted pictures of her online?”

Joe nodded. “Petfinder dot com.”

“And that’s why you felt so free to liberally mock her appearance like she had no human dignity?”

“Shehasno human dignity,” Joe said. “She’s a dog.”

“You said some harsh things,” I said. “Even for a dog.”

Joe dropped his shoulders, likeCome on.

“I see,” I said.

Joe pulled in a deep breath now as the full understanding hit him. “You thought,” he said, “that I had a one-night stand with a drooly, noisy, sheet-shredding actual human female and then made fun of her body the next day on the phone in a public elevator before posting sleeping photos of her online?”

I made my voice very tiny. “Kind of?”

“No wonder you were so mean to me.”

“Was I?”

“Yeah! And I deserved it!”

“Right?” I said, trying to draw a tentative alliance.

Joe sighed. Then he sighed again. Then he said, “For the record. I have not slept with anyone—at all—since I walked in on my wife hot-tubbing naked with Teague Phillips, the Planet’s Most Boring Wanker.”

But now we had a whole new topic. “Oof,” I said. “That’s a long time.”

“I’m aware.”

“A really long time.”

“Thank you.”

I shook my head. “I thought… you were a total player.”

“You thought I was a totaldouchebag.”

I hunched up my shoulders. “Sorry?”

“I’m not a player, Sadie. I’m a damned monk.”

I felt a buzzing realization that this, right here, was another of Joe’s problems that I had the power to do something about.

Joe sighed. “Look. Here’s the truth. There’s exactly one person in this entire building I have any interest in sleeping with. And I don’t even think she likes me very much.”

Please don’t let it be Parker. Please don’t let it be Parker.

My heart clamped closed. “Who is it?”

But Joe didn’t answer.

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