Page 129 of Happiness for Beginners

“Okay,” I said. I was waiting for something more, some kind of indication that I was somewhere—anywhere at all—in his thoughts, the way he was in mine.

But nothing.

And then, at last, I got sick of waiting. If I meant something to him he’d have said so by now. He would have told me with the same ease he applied to everything. I took a step back. It was useless, hoping and longing. There was no possible anticipation in it—only torture. I’d had enough. My poor, tired heart couldn’t take anymore.

Behind him, outside the ballroom entrance and across the hallway, the elevator dinged and opened again just as I felt the sting in my chest that comes right before you start to cry.

“I’ve got to go,” I said. At that moment I wanted nothing more than to make it to that elevator just as the doors slid closed behind me—with Jake on the other side.

But Jake followed. “Hey!”

I kept walking, but he caught up and grabbed my elbow before I made it, and the elevator closed and slid away without me.

“Where are you going?” Jake demanded.

I turned and he saw the tears in my eyes. “Anywhere but here.”

He frowned. “What’s going on?”

I really don’t know why I told him the truth. Other than maybe I suspected that he already knew. I stood up taller and tried to be brave. My hands were shaking—hell, my whole body was—and I stuffed them in my pockets in fists. Then, taking a deep breath and looking up at the hallway ceiling to restrain the tears, I said, “When I saw you just now, I thought for a second that you’d come back for me.”

I locked my gaze on the acoustical tiles above. I knew that the minute I looked down, the drops were going to spill over.

When Jake spoke next, his voice was softer. “I did come back for you.”

I lowered my eyes at that. Tears fell as predicted, and, with them, I let out a little sob. “You did?” I lifted a shaky hand to wipe under my eyes.

Jake nodded.

“Why didn’t you say that before?” I demanded.

His voice was as tender as I’d ever heard it. “I wasn’t done,” he said with a shrug.

With that, he took a step closer, put his arms around me, and rested his chin on my head. I pressed the side of my face against his lapel, and we stood there for I don’t know how long. Long enough, though, for that same elevator to ding open, discharge another crowd of party guests, close, and disappear again.

“The night of the banquet,” he went on after a while, “after you left, Windy put the moves on me.”

“So?”

“So then we had to have a discussion.”

I held still. “Why?”

“Because sheliked me.”

I stepped back to gape at him. “Of course she liked you! You guys were a couple!”

Jake had been about to say something, but that stopped him. He frowned and shoved his hands in his pockets. “We were not a couple.”

“Yes, you were.”

“I think I would know.”

“You were a couple! A perfect couple! You both have summer homes in Maine and like peanut butter, or something. You almost proposed marriage to her at Painted Meadow. I myself personally saw you making out at the trailhead during Hugh’s evac.”

Jake winced. “You saw that.”

“I saw it. And it was a hell of a kiss.”

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