Page 16 of Sneak Attack

And that was how I kept it, why I kept Selma happy, why I stood and shook Irv’s hand hello even while he spit daggers at me through his eyes, and why I kept my mouth shut when Selma posted pics of us on her Instagram, allowing people to think we were together.

Because if the media or fans ever discovered the truth?

That halo would be thrown into fire and burned to ash…my good guy reputation along with it.

* * *

“You’re ready. Good job.” Coach Paul Bowles slapped my shoulder and headed off to yell at the receivers.

He was right. I was ready for our first preseason game. I was ready to hopefully bring a championship to Nashville and I was more than ready to lead my team to the playoffs again this year. After going from a team who was typically middle of the pack in our division, to finally making it to the wild card playoff game last year, we were fortunate to have almost all of our best players returning, few traded, and a couple key rookies picked up in the draft. That meant our team was filled with seasoned veterans, men who’d felt the thrill of making the playoffs and were determined to again this year—be better. More powerful. Stronger. More winning—both in our stats and our attitude. Football was equal amount heart and strength and mental capabilities and ever since I’d heard Eden’s SUV had rolled back into town, my mental game was off.

Last night’s stroll to the boulder because I was craving one more glimpse of her, even as much as I wanted to rail and scream at her, was a mistake.

Too bad I was finding it harder to stay away, especially now I knew, from the pain-filled way she’d said she couldn’t forget either, she held as much guilt for what happened as I once did.

The problem was I knew it wasn’t our fault.

It was an accident, and it wasn’t right Eden was still carrying that blame all these years later.

But how in the hell was I going to make it right?

I might have been ready for our upcoming game, our upcoming season, but I was in no way ready or prepared to deal with Eden. Not like this. Not when she was here for a short time and I didn’t want her to leave, still carrying that load again.

“Hey. Did good today.” Dawson tugged at the chinstraps of his helmet and released them. “Things better?”

“Like I said before, things are fine.”

“Lie to yourself all you want, and me, I get it. It’s personal. But just make sure it doesn’t show up on Sunday.”

“Fuck off, Butler.”

So he could read me, knew even when I was playing like I should be, my head wasn’t in it. I could lie and say that was fine, I could win this game with my eyes closed, but I’d quit lying to others a long time ago.

Only the truth from that night forward.

“Hey!” I called as he jogged past me, heading for Yeets.

“Yeah?”

“I’ll be here. And ready. Promise.”

That much I could promise him.

A smirk became visible behind his facemask. “Hell yeah, you will be.”

I shook my head and slapped the football. Practice was done, and most of the guys were heading off to the locker rooms but there were a few still on the field, still running routes. Our backup quarterback, Sam Denmark who was a rookie barely younger than me, was throwing passes in case he needed to take the field if the worst happened to me.

That was the wake-up call I needed.

By Sunday morning when I stepped onto this field for our first preseason game at home since losing in the wild card game, my head, heart, and body would be focused on only one thing—bringing the Super Bowl Championship to Nashville. Because no one was taking my starting position, not until, at minimum, I had one of those rings on my finger.

* * *

“Jasper. Grab Bongo’s leash, would ya?”

It was eight, and the sun was still shining, but would be setting soon. Jasper was already in his pajamas, ready for bed, but if Eden was anything like the girl she used to be, she’d be wanting to head back to the boulder if I scared her away last night. Which meant tonight, I’d wait until she was there. Jasper wouldn’t mind a sleepover at Grandma and Grandpa’s, and it was easier for Selma to get him on their side of town in the morning after work, anyway.

All excuses I’d told myself while we had dinner, I gave him a bath, and played Super Mario Bros together. Mom and Dad wouldn’t mind if I showed up unannounced either, although they weren’t stupid. Their silent looks I got last night when I showed up for dinner and later declared I was taking a walk said plenty.

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