Page 112 of The Blood Traitor

“The Eye?” Jaren asked, sounding puzzled.

She was about to tell him no, but he went on before she could.

“I went through Ashlyn’s possessions when Cal and I arrived at Highworth Keep. The blade she has there looks exactly the same as the Eye. A perfect replica, just like the ceremonial one I wore for official events. The resemblance is astounding. But I didn’t want to keep it, if that’s what you’re asking. I saw no need, with it not being the actual Eye.”

Kiva shook her head. “No, I meant your magic. Do you miss it?”

She didn’t know why she was asking — ofcoursehe missed his magic. But she wanted to know every part of him, even the parts that hurt. Especially those parts.

He turned silent, considering his answer. All the while, he continued tracing patterns on her arm, as if it were equally soothing to him.

Finally, he admitted, “I struggled at first. The early days were the hardest. It was like I had a phantom limb — my mind told me I still had magic, even if every time I tried to use it, nothing happened.”

His hand moved then, trailing softly up over her shoulder until his fingers began playing with her hair. “Believe it or not, you actually helped me, in a way.”

Kiva started, and swiveled to look up at him. “Me?”

“Cal told me about your power, how you’d repressed it for a decade, terrified of what would happen if someone realized what you could do,” Jaren answered, his voice contemplative. “It made me realize how fortunate I was to have had such freedom. That day we went to Silverthorn together and visited the children — I’ve been able to do things like that my whole life.” Sadness touched his face then, but his gaze remained focused on his fingers in her hair, as if he couldn’t quite look at her as he shared, “That’s what I miss the most. Not the battle training or even the everyday uses my magic had, but the ways it could bring joy to others. Like what my mother did at the River Festival, and what the rest of my family does at the other seasonal celebrations — it requires so little effort on our end, but to our people, it means everything. So giving that part up has been hard. And also —”

He broke off quickly, as if regretting what he’d been about to say.

“Also, what?” Kiva gently urged.

It took a full minute before Jaren answered, still avoiding her eyes as he said, “You already know the reason I was named my mother’s heir is because I can wield all four elements.Couldwield them,” he corrected,uncomfortable. At Kiva’s encouraging squeeze, he went on, “If we manage to reclaim Evalon, the Royal Council will most likely strip me of my title as crown prince. And I already mentioned how Mirryn will be charged for her role in everything. So that means Oriel will have to be named Evalon’s heir.”

Kiva’s arms tightened around Jaren, hearing his sorrow. But his next words surprised her, because he wasn’t upset for himself.

“Ori is so young,” Jaren said mournfully. “The decision will take the rest of his childhood away. There’s so much he’ll need to learn, most of which my father helped me navigate, but now he —” Jaren stopped to clear his throat, his voice rough with renewed grief as he said, “Now I’ll have to help Ori. And I will — of course I will. I just wish that burden didn’t have to fall to him.”

Kiva’s heart ached for Jaren — for so many reasons. “I’m sorry about your father,” she told him softly. “I wish I could have been there for you.”

Jaren rested his lips against her temple and said back, just as softly, “I’m sorry you were sent back to Zalindov. When I saw you that first night at Stoneforge and Cresta told us where you’d been, what Zuleeka and Mirryn had done, how Rooke had allocated you to the tunnels...” He trailed off, shuddering.

“I survived,” Kiva said, not wanting to talk about it, partly because the memories still haunted her, but also because she could see how distressed Jaren was at the thought of her being back there. “But about your magic and Oriel — there’s something you keep forgetting.”

She opened her palm for him to see the rings she still held.

Jaren caught her eyes then, his like a stormy sea. “I know you want to use the Hand on me, and believe me, if it truly does what Galdric claims, then I want that, too. But I just — I don’t want to get my hopes up. For now, I need to focus on what I do have, not on what I don’t. If I get my magic back, then I’ll be forever grateful. But in case that doesn’t happen...”

He trailed off again, but Kiva didn’t need him to finish. She could understand his hesitancy, could even respect it. But she also knew that, despite him coming to a place of acceptance, it still pained him that his magic was gone, in ways she hadn’t considered. Not once had she thought about his title and how his lack of elemental power might affect his right to rule. In knowing that now, she was even more determined to help restore what he’d lost. While she was sure Oriel would make a good ruler, especially with Jaren’s patient guidance, there was no doubt in her mind that Jaren was born to be king.Thatwas his future — and she was going to do everything inherpower to make sure that came about.

“You have your thinking face on,” Jaren said, touching a finger to the crease in her brow. “Do I want to know what’s going through your mind right now?”

Kiva grinned. “Probably not.” He would learn soon enough — once they had the final ring. Just one more city, and then he would have his magic back. She had to believe that. She had to hope, even if he couldn’t.

A sudden absence of sound made Kiva look out the cave mouth, where she saw the rain was finally easing. It had to be midafternoon; there was no way they would make it down the mountain by nightfall, but if they reached the tree line by then, the danger of falling into a crevice would be gone. And once they made it to their horses, the lower part of the trail would be much easier, even in the dark — though she would still use her magic to light the way. While Kiva was tempted by the idea of having Jaren to herself all night, she wasn’t keen to sleep in the smelly cave, especially with the temperature already dropping. Better for them to try and return to Lyras, especially before they lost any more light.

Jaren seemed to be of the same mind. “I think maybe we should —”

He was cut off when a wall of air slammed into them from the cave’s entrance, prompting him to pull Kiva closer, shielding her with his body. But as quickly as it had come, the wind was gone.

Both Kiva and Jaren scrambled to their feet, looking at each other in bewilderment.

“What was —”

Kiva didn’t get a chance to finish before Ashlyn stepped into view, her face pale.

“Ash, what —” Jaren began, but his cousin spoke over him.

---