Page 121 of The Gilded Cage

“What’s, uh, going on?” she asked, eyes wide.

“You need an outfit for tomorrow night,” the princess answered, and with no further warning, she began giving orders to the maidservants as the tailor approached Kiva to take her measurements. He then forced her into gown after gown, with both him and Mirryn providing a running — and critical — commentary.

“Too puffy!”

“Needs more sparkle!”

“Not enough bosom!”

“Far too much bosom!”

“Why are there so many ruffles? Less ruffles!Noruffles!”

And on it went.

Forhours.

By the time they finally settled on the perfect dress, it took all of Kiva’s remaining patience to keep from screaming when the tailor, Nevard, stated that they now needed to choose a mask.

Ready to pull out Naari’s dagger and threaten violence, Kiva turned pleading eyes to Mirryn, only to find the princess looking back at her with clear amusement. She did, however, recognize that Kiva was at her wits’ end, and calmly said to Nevard, “Why don’t we pick one for her, and send it along later. It can be a surprise.”

The tailor looked horrified by the thought, but he bobbed his head. “As you wish, Your Highness.”

He and his entourage swiftly packed up, leaving only the gown and a pair of matching slippers before disappearing out the door.

Mirryn, however, remained behind, reaching out to take Kiva’s hands.

“I heard you had an ... incident ... with Mother the other night,” she said. “Are you all right?”

Having not expected this conversation, and certainly not with Mirryn, Kiva haltingly admitted, “It ... surprised me. She’s always been so lovely to me. Somotherly. The change in behavior was, um, a little shocking.” And it had nearly killed her, but Kiva left that part unsaid.

Mirryn nodded solemnly. “I’m not defending her actions, but just so you know, she’d had a bad day. Father nearly fainted when they were celebrating the bridge opening, and it’s not public knowledge that he’s sick, so Mother feared rumors might start spreading. After they returned and he’d gone to bed, the angeldust helped her take the edge off. She only ever uses it when she’s feeling overwhelmed.” Quickly, she added, “But again, I’m not defending her. What she did to you —” Mirryn shook her head, then touched the amulet around Kiva’s neck. “I’m really glad Jaren gave you this.”

Kiva had no idea how to reconcile this new, concerned side of the princess, so she settled on nodding her agreement.

“You should also know, she doesn’t remember,” Mirryn said. “Mother, I mean. She was asking about you yesterday, wondering where you and Jaren were and wanting to make sure you were all right after reuniting with your family.” Mirryn’s blue eyes held hers as she went on, “She’s come to care for you, Kiva. Very much. Just like we all have. And I know it might be hard for you to believe right now, but when Mother loves, she loves hard.Especiallythose she considers family.”

A squeeze of Mirryn’s fingers made Kiva realize, with some shock, that she was being included in that statement.

“There isn’t anything she wouldn’t do for us,” the princess went on. “I know she’d bring down entire kingdoms if anything ever happened to Jaren or Ori or me. She wouldn’t hesitate to do whatever it took to make sure we were safe. Just as I know the same would be true for you.”

Kiva was breathing heavily, unsure why Mirryn was saying all this.

With a final hand squeeze, the princess released her and finished, “I know it’s hard, but if you can find it in your heart to forgive her, to remember that it’s the drug and not the user ...” She trailed off, seemingly unable to finish.

But Kiva didn’t need her to say more, already aware of how addictions worked, and more familiar with angeldust than she would have liked. Too many of Zalindov’s inmates had relied on the drug, especially those who were assigned to the harder work allocations, like the tunnellers and quarriers. But their dependence only caused more problems in the long run, their addictions hard to shake, the withdrawal almost impossible to survive, especially in a prison environment. And the risk of overdose ... So many of them had chosen a numbing death over a pain-filled life, a decision that had never failed to devastate Kiva, each and every time it happened.

“Anyway,” Mirryn said when Kiva remained silent for too long. “That’s enough seriousness. I just wanted you to be aware that she has no memory of what happened, and it’s best if we keep it that way.”

Kiva wondered how much of Jaren’s abuse had been kept hidden from the queen, whether she was even aware of what she’d done to him before he’d learned how to protect himself. Kiva was willing to bet Ariana had no idea, just as she was willing to bet that Jaren had taken all of her drug-addled cruelty in order that his siblings might be spared.

I thought she’d stopped,he’d said after his mother’s attack.Shetold meshe’d stopped.

Would Ariana have stopped for real if she’d known about the damage she’d caused him? Or was she too reliant on the drug to give it up? It was difficult to know for sure — and that was perhaps why her children had kept the truth from her. Kiva wasn’t convinced she would have made the same decision, not if someone she loved was being hurt, but nevertheless she felt great compassion for the impossible situation they were in.

“I’ll make sure we choose the perfect mask to go with your dress,” Mirryn went on, acting as if their heavy conversation had never happened. “You’re going to look absolutely stunning — I can’t wait to see Jaren’s reaction.”

Heat flooded Kiva’s cheeks, and she quickly deflected, “What about you? Have you chosen your dress?”