Page 88 of You Started It

“No.” I twist my arm free from Ben’s grasp. “I want to hear what Axel has to say.”

Silence descends on the four of us. My eyes meet Axel’s, pleading with him to say something. He bites on his lower lip, his gazemoving between everyone. “I did slide into Olivia’s DMs after Wonderland, but it wasn’t so I could get with her. I was digging for information.”

Olivia squints her eyes at Axel. “What information?”

Axel focuses his attention on me. “I knew you wouldn’t be able to fully move on until you got the closure you needed from your relationship with Ben. And I knew you’d only get that closure once you learned the truth about what happened between him and Olivia at camp.”

“Jamie knows what happened. Nothing,” Ben interrupts.

“Let him speak,” I say to Ben, while keeping my eyes locked on Axel.

“I wanted an opportunity to speak to Olivia face-to-face, so I asked her to grab a coffee. But she basically told me to screw off and that she was with Ben. When I tried to explain that I wasn’t actually asking her out, she said she didn’t believe me and told me to stop messaging her. So I did.”

“Told you I didn’t do anything wrong,” Olivia says, glaring at Ben.

“Okay. But what’s this about?” I ask, waving my hand between Axel and Olivia. “Are you with Olivia now?”

“No!” Axel and Olivia say in unison.

A knifelike pain pierces through my stomach. I rub my hand over my lower abdomen and Axel’s eyes meet mine.

“Green apple?” he asks.

“Green apple,” I respond quietly.

“You can come inside if you need to,” Axel offers.

“Why are you and Olivia hanging out?” I ask again, ignoring my stomach cramp. “I saw her leaving your house a couple weeks ago, so this clearly isn’t just a one-time thing.”

“Wounded birds nest together,” Olivia says, crossing her arms over her chest. “We both needed someone to talk to. Someonewho would understand what we’re going through. I didn’t realize Axel was just using me.” She glares at Axel, who is still looking at me.

“You talked to Olivia about me? About us?” I ask, feeling my face scrunch up. Another piercing pain shoots through my stomach.

“She told me the truth,” Axel says. “Ben kissed herbeforehe broke up with you.”

“Is that true?” I ask Ben, this interaction giving me whiplash. He bows his head low and I step right up to him. “Answer me.”

“It was a mistake and I told Olivia we couldn’t do anything else until I spoke to you.”

“I knew it,” I say, shaking my head.

“I stopped it from going any further,” Ben says, probably thinking that it makes what happened okay. “I slipped up.”

“And then you lied about it. Repeatedly.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” he says.

A stunted laugh escapes me. “Is that why you unceremoniously dumped me the day you came back from camp?”

“I’m not sure what you think I should have done instead. At least I didn’t ghost you.”

“Oh. At least,” I say, repeating Ben’s words back. “The fact that you thought we could get back together without telling me the truth first…Is that how little you respect me? After three years of being my boyfriend, you didn’t think I deserved to know the truth?”

“No. It’s not like that. I just knew you were hurting over Axel and I was hurting over Olivia and thought it might be…I don’t know what I thought,” Ben says, raking both hands through his hair.

“Apparently,” Olivia says, hurt radiating in her voice. “You can’t just ping-pong back and forth between girls, messing with their emotions, Ben. It’s not fair.”

I run my hands over my face. “So what’s this?” I ask Axel, nodding to Olivia. “You two are besties now? Divulging secrets? Sharing war stories? Trash-talking me?”